How NOT to Wind Up in the Same Situation Again and Again

share this post:

share this post:

Recently a good friend came to me because she’d just ended a relationship. It was the latest in a string of relationships that were all essentially the same, with the same problems and issues.

After listening to her, I got real with her. I told her, “This is your Universal assignment.”

What are Universal assignments?

We all have personal stories of fear and doubt and uncertainty from the past that we need to heal. And until we do, they keep showing up in our life — because the Universe is communicating a very important message to us.

In this video, I share the 3 steps to take when you’re ready to show up for a Universal assignment. (I also call these spiritual assignments.) You have the capacity to heal past wounds! Show up for your Universal assignments and become free.

Watch below and keep reading for a breakdown of the steps.

How to recognize a Universal assignment

When my friend called me, she said, “Oh my God. Here I am, 37 years old, still single, and I just broke up with this guy because it was the same relationship that I’ve been replaying over and over.”

She had just lived out the same story she’d experienced with all her past boyfriends. She always ended up not feeling good enough, stuck in an unhappy partnership with a guy who made her feel like she was inadequate.

What’s your Universal assignment?

This is a classic Universal assignment. I told my friend: “There’s a part of you that doesn’t feel good enough in relationships. You keep attracting guys who trigger that wound within you, but you are not showing up for the wound. So the assignment keeps showing up for you in all these different partnerships.”

She said, “You know what? You’re right. It keeps showing up in all these different forms.”

You may have a Universal assignment of your own. What situation keeps showing up in your life over and over? Do you keep ending up in the same bad financial situation? Are all your jobs frustrating in the same way? Is there a habit you vow to break but keep going back to? This is your universal assignment.

How to show up for your Universal assignments

So how do you show up for these universal assignments? How can you NOT wind up in the same situation again and again? Follow these steps.

Step 1: Accept the assignment

We have to first and foremost accept that we have this assignment. Accept what the assignment is. Look at it and call it by its name. It’s your Universal assignment. When you accept the assignment, you give yourself permission to begin the healing process. So just own it. Say, “This is what’s up for me. I am in this story. I’ve got to heal it. I’ve got to move through it.”

Step 2: Honor your feelings

The next step is to let yourself feel whatever pain, discomfort and sadness lives below your assignment. When you realize you’re in the same situation again, stop yourself. Give yourself the time and space to feel the feelings underneath that assignment.

When we step back into the old patterns and the addictive behaviors, it’s because we’re not truly feeling the feeling underneath that wound. At this point you can open up to deeper healing work. That deep healing work often comes through a person like a therapist or a coach. When you honor your feelings and open up to this healing, you will be led to the person or people who can help you.

Step 3: Pray

After you feel the feeling, the next step is to pray. You can say a prayer such as this one:

I am willing to show up for this Universal assignment. I’m willing to see this differently and I’m ready to experience transformation.

Or your prayer can be really simple, like: “I witness the assignment and I need help. Show me what you’ve got.” Say this prayer daily. Say it in the moment.

When you put out this call for help, you will receive guidance. So your job becomes surrendering to the guidance, which leads us to our last step…

Tweet: What freaks you out is actually a divine opportunity. @gabbybernstein #spiritjunkie

Step 4: Pay attention to the guidance you receive

When you listen to the guidance that comes through, very interesting things will start to happen for you. You may be led to that therapist who gives you that exact divine, beautiful guidance that you need.

I had this experience! When I made the commitment to show up for one of my biggest Universal assignments, I was led to a life coach many years ago who helped me transform it, heal it and move through it.

Recently I was ready to show up for another assignment, and I got into deep prayer. I said, “I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to heal this. I need help.” And I was led to a new therapist who is rocking my world!

Spirit works through people. When you open up to receive that guidance and you pray for it, it will be given to you.

Read or leave comments


I only recommend products and brands I passionately believe in, but wanted you to know that when I make a recommendation, I may receive a referral fee.


Heal trauma, unlearn fear and remember love.


Listen for real-time coaching, straight talk and big love!


Attract everything you want with my most impactful meditations.


Everything you need to stay
consistent on your spiritual path.

“The next best thing to having
Gabby as your personal coach!”

By using this site, you agree to our privacy policy.

Accept Read More