Getting What You Want Doesn’t Have to Be a Struggle

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This topic is a big one. Are you ready?

Today I’m talking about how you don’t have to struggle in order to get what you want.

Take a deep breath. Let it sink in.

Doesn’t that feel good?

In our culture, we’ve been taught that pain has purpose. We think suffering equals success. That we have to “make” things happen, that nothing good ever comes without struggle.

And look: We do go through very difficult circumstances in our lives – trauma, addiction, and beyond.

Tweet: I do not have to suffer to be successful @gabbybernstein #spiritjunkie

While that suffering can sometimes be necessary to help us heal or grow, it’s NOT the key to our successes.

The plain and simple truth is this: We don’t have to suffer to be happy.

I want to abolish that idea today. Clear it out of your mind.

In fact, suffering actually blocks our successes. It keeps us from freedom and joy. In the video, I talk about how I learned this lesson big-time in my own life in just the past few months (and how my manifesting has skyrocketed since then).

Want to learn more about how to create the world you want without struggle? Join me on August 16 for my free workshop: How to Manifest Your Desires. During this workshop I’ll share my foolproof method for releasing everything that stands in your way of having what you want.

The workshop is valued at $149, but it’s free when you preorder my new book, The Universe Has Your Back. Lock in your spot here.

Read or leave comments


  1. Amazing! I work so much and have been known to shame myself for not doing enough; not finishing this or that, socializing when I had SO much work to do, etc….you’ve definitely challenged me with the idea of stepping back a bit and maybe doing things a little bit differently. I don’t know how that looks on a daily basis exactly, but I feel that I have to remind myself of this blog often:-)

    1. You can take it one day at a time- commit to your practice and let spirit guide you to the next right action each day 🙂 xo

  2. Mmmmm …. Simple words, hard to action. Still, I’m open to letting go today – wish me luck! Thanks Gabby.

  3. I’m really grateful for this post, Gabby. Thank you for sharing. I definitely come from a background where there was a “no pain no gain” type of attitude. I’m definitely trying to release this in my own life, and get out of my own way! I’m definitely going to keep repeating your mantra to myself – “I do not have to suffer to be successful!”

  4. Thanks, Gabby. I needed to hear this today. I copied into my journal: “I can be happy and free and create the world I want to see.” I had been enjoying a reduced workload this summer to spend time with my kids. Then my husband was laid off suddenly and I went into “anxious hustle” mode, shaming myself for not working harder. Now I can see how that is not serving me. I am going to let go of the struggle mentality.

  5. In this moment I let go of my suffering. In this moment I am recognizing I don’t have to be in pain to have purpose in my life.

  6. Dear Gabby – recently my significant other got an ENORMOUS opportunity at work that I have been dreaming of my whole life. I felt so happy for him but equally so awful – as if I were struggling and sweating for something, while he just walked right into it. But maybe that’s the point. I am reframing this sadness as a chance to learn that my struggle may be blocking me from this dream. THANK YOU for your amazingly-timed videos, as always!!!!

  7. I’m diving deep into letting go of drama and suffering in my life right now. So thank you very much for making this message so super clear today. For me it is a process of unlearning a pattern of thinking I cultivated long long time ago to survive. It feels so good, creating such freedom, so much more me to letting go and turning towards the life I want. So for me at the same time it is a process of letting go and creation in equal parts. Patience, persistence and happy anticipation! ????????

  8. Awesome! My new mantra: I live my life with ease. Achieving my goals and dreams with joy and happiness! Thank you for the encouragement!

  9. Today I let go of the idea that I have to shed blood and tears and feel immense pain in order to reach my goals. Letting this thought go gives ME the freedom to make my own choices and accomplish MY happiness, rather than everyone else’s. I feel like I have been painfully living my life through a never-ending maze of everyone else’s happiness and my happiness is at the end of this crazy maze. Will I ever accomplish everyone’s goals? And will I have any energy or fight left to reach my own happiness?

  10. This is great Gabby! I love this video and I truly think that we do not need to suffer to get what we want. I had been struggling for years, working more than 10 hours per day and suffering a lot, I punished myself all the time and nothing was ever enough. Since I started a profound self awareness journey, I was able to change my mentality and career, decided not to suffer any more, then my new projetcs started growing, I launched my own company and I am free and happy now! Living the present moment and enjoying the numerous possibilities the world can offer us. Thank you for your message, I am big fan of your work.

  11. This is the exact message I received from the universe this weekend. So crazy how you talked about it today. I am on my 150th job application with only a few months left in savings to pay for living expenses. I decided that I was ready to listed to what the universe wanted me to do and that is to move across country to AZ and become an elementary teacher. I’m so excited for this new adventure and there is not one ounce of struggling for this move. Thanks Gabby!

  12. Love the way you express all that you have inside to us. Thank u for always sharing and leave us hope words, to make our lives easier, God bless u

  13. I love this message Gabby!! and really needed to hear it as I grow my own business and am a constant multi-tasker. I want to have fun developing my brand, helping people get healthy and fit. I don’t want it to feel like a burden, so thank you for reminding me that it doesn’t have to be a struggle. I focused on doing what I can, when I can and having fun as I go. Namaste!

  14. Really needed this mantra for today.:-) From here and now I will live my life with much more ease than earlier, and that I am letting go of my obstacles and suffering <3 Thank you.

  15. Gabby,
    I preordered the book and signed up for the workshop online BUT August 16 is my 13th wedding anniversary and we are celebrating in Vail, CO. Will it be available via a link later on? I will be at your retreat next weekend, so maybe I could ask you then. Thank you and best wishes,

  16. This message really resonated with me today and I wrote the mantra down and will starting saying it. Looking forward to your receiving your book!

  17. in this moment I let go of suffering. I release the belief that I have to be in pain to have purpose.
    God bless you Gabby!

  18. This was at the perfect time. I’m letting go of my traumas and suffering. I can create a successful life without holding onto pain. Thank you!!!!

  19. It is always such a pleasure and honor when i find a new Video from you in my inbox! I really resonate with you and your work. Thank you so much, Gabby! xo Nathalie

  20. Wow. Right time, right words. This is what I needed today.
    I’m still working on it and it is easier said than done. Still, I don’t need to suffer to be successful. I release the believe that I need to suffer and feel the pain t achieve my goals.
    This feels awesome 🙂
    Thanks, Gabby.
    Hear you in August 🙂

  21. Suffering leads to me being stuck and not being an instrument for the universes purpose for me. Thanks for the reminder

  22. In this moment, I let go of all my sufferings and hard work, that blocks me from living my true purpose and following my bliss ????

  23. Received this message nicely today :-). Right now I am manifesting a new home for me and my pet. I honestly believe that the Universe will deliver, and I’m following, allowing and once again believeing….I honestly believe I CAN live my dreams.

    When I look back on how I did use to suffer to get the things I wanted, struggle and push see/believe not much was possible for me, being in the position I am in today, ie my mindset and the spiritual and emotional growth I have done which has completely changed my life, it is hard to comprehend the past. Still have my days of doubt though, but I have support systems in place to help me shore up my faith…..I will fully believe it when something tangible happens to me….then my inspiration and belief will inspire others too.

    Thank you! And PS loving your self image and outfits too xoxo

  24. Hallelujah. Thank you for giving us all permission to believe and accept that this is possible xx

    For me, believing it’s possible is one step but actually believing and accepting that I DESERVE to feel this happy and free seems to take a lot of courage??

    In the past I think I have felt blindly, almost recklessly happy and free at times, which is nice too, but so different to how I’ve allowed myself to feel in moments lately, which is mindfully, gratefully and fully deservedly happy and free. Whoa.

    Thank you Gabby for all your guidance that has allowed me to get to this place. I feel like I’ve got my foot on the next rock feeling for how stable it is before planting my foot firmly on it 😉

    I want to consistently remind myself that I deserve to feel happy and free and that I can create the world I want to see!

  25. Thanks, Gabby!
    In this moment, I’m letting go of my suffering. I’m honouring my space in the world by letting go of shame and guilt from never doing “enough”. I deserve to feel peace with my own decisions.

  26. Serenity is the key to my success. Gurmuhk told us in class on Sunday to retell our story. I’m no longer going to struggle in pain to receive the love I want. The pain from my childhood does not define me, it empowers me to heal myself and others. Thank you for this message! Totally synchronicity with yoga class Sunday!

  27. I needed to hear this so bad today. For years, I am down playing my success (education, work,..) because it came easy to me e.g. it didnt’t need a too big effort on my part. So I felt that these successes don’t really count at all because I didn’t had to shet blood, sweat and tears in order to get there.
    Listening to Gabby instantly brought this issue up and I will try to work on it.

  28. In this moment I am replacing the word earn with the word allow. I am a divine being. I don’t have to earn anything!

  29. Hi Gabby,
    Perfect timing! Thank you for this beautiful message. I am just now learning to release all of that “stuff” and move forward and be my true self. All of that was holding me back, keeping me fearful, unsure, paralyzed. I am free….. <3
    much love to you,

  30. I do not have to suffer to be successful.
    I can create the beautiful
    Life I desire with ease and grace.
    Thank you for this sacred truth.
    I will keep it in my mind and heart today

  31. In this moment, I am letting go of my idea that I need to struggle or work so hard and so much in order to succeed! Opening to the miracles and manifestation

  32. Dear Gabby,
    Thank you for sharing this message. One thing I have been struggling with for years is what to do when you when your intentions come from a place of self love, but the people that surround you don’t support that. I was an overeater for most of my life, and for the last few years I have committed to self love and respecting food and my body through the daily practice of mindful eating. My family and friends have noticed this change, and I have experienced a lot of negativity from many of them now that I make healthier choices. I am questioned and pressured in a lot of social situations about what I’m eating, why I didn’t put something offered on my plate, and how much I’m eating. I can’t figure out why I’ve been attracting this kind of negativity for years, and I end up feeling the same guilt that I felt when I overate… as if I am doing something wrong by turning down red meat or an extra big slice of cake! How can I approach releasing this struggle without the support of the people in my life? Is there some lesson that I could be missing in this experience of so much negativity from the people in my life?

    1. Hi Amanda,
      This is such a great question! First of all congratulations on making the decision to heal your relationship with food from a place of love. That is an incredible gift to give yourself and one to be very proud of. You can begin to heal the negative experiences you are having with family and friends by connecting back to the reasons you have chosen this lifestyle for yourself. When you support yourself and are confident in your answers despite the pressure or negativity you receive, you can begin to dissolve these boundaries with love.
      xo Gab

  33. In this moment I give up the panic of starting my own business, and the fear that I cannot do it. I choose trust. I am allowing the help that is all around me, and inviting even more of it. Thank you Gabby and I am so grateful for everything the world has to offer me so that I can carry out this great work!

  34. I let go of my suffering.
    I let go of the idea that I have to work hard to get succes.
    I need help. I am open for all the help for becoming super succesful.

  35. Hi – this video is so timely for me. I need to let go big time in my work environment. I can see it is not serving me and that achieving my aims will be hampered by my work mindset that thinks more is more, instead of learning to let go and trust the universe has my back, which will of course free up my mind to be receptive to new ideas and achieve my goal. That process begins today!

  36. You got me once again hooked up
    YOu are such a sweet girl and you always inspire me to thrive, shine, get the best out of me and so much more
    I just love to watch you and your integrity.
    Last time I listened to you and got into action was when you had the
    “May cause Miracles” This 6 week course was amazing, even so I cannot remember anything, hahahhaaha but at the time it was just great great great and great
    I have the feeling this call now comes again at the right time, even so I don´t read a lot of books since a while and still have some on my shelf which I haven´t finished but I am going to order this one for sure and can´t wait to get it into my fingers and the workshop in August
    May you be blessed with love, joy, peace, ease, success, happiness, laughter, fun, wealth, health, beauty, loving caring supporting people and so much more.
    Thanks for being you!!!
    Thanks for being in my life!
    Got every book from you and love them
    You are a star you really are and you shine and thrive and I want to copy as much as possible to shine my star to the fullest
    Thank you
    big hug and lots of kisses

  37. in the moment, i release my suffering. i don’t need to struggle to find peace, happiness and satisfaction in my life.

  38. I dont have to suffer to be succesful, I dont have to suffer to have what I want… I can be happy!! I choose to be happy!! I release this concept…thx!!!

  39. In this moment, I let go of my suffering. In this moment, I choose me, I choose the field of all possibilities, and I choose to heed the call and live my purpose.
    Thank you Gabby for being a wonderful guide, spirit, and light in this world.

  40. Music to my ears today. I do not have to suffer to be successful and create the life I dream of. Even if what that is is a little hazy at the moment. Thanks Gabby. Love your no BS straight talking love!

    V xx

  41. Dear Gabby,
    A few weeks ago I ask for guidance and help, to understand who I am, your book; The Universe Has Your Back was the first to come to me while looking online for understanding. Thank You, maybe the Universe guided me straight to you! And thank you. You are a true inspiration to the all human being of the world. Thank you for allowing me to use this mantra.
    Leaning towards LOVE,
    I do not have to suffer to be successful, I can be happy and free to create the world I want to see! In this moment I am letting go of my suffering, In this moment, I am recognizing I do not have to be in pain to have purpose in my Life.

  42. I do not have to suffer to have a great day. I do not have to plan, have planning thoughts, think about what to do after I have done what I’m doing right now. I do not have to get in this frantic energy to get things done. I do not have to control my life! I can be happy, energetic and feel good. I can live in the moment. When I have a planning thought I say: ‘Thank you, planning thought. I don’t need you. I live in the moment and decide in this moment what feels good to do right now.’
    Thank you, Gabby!

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