The Cord-Cutting Meditation Helps You Get Closure from a Past Relationship

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Meditating regularly is one of the most powerful and healing actions you can take for yourself and the world. Step 5 of Judgment Detox is devoted to this practice.

The meditations in the book help you energetically clear your judgmental attachments and heal. We begin with the cord-cutting meditation.

The power of meditation

Even a few minutes of meditation in the morning can recalibrate your mind and energy for the rest of the day. Meditation is the way we reconnect to the loving nature within us.

Judgment Detox by Gabby BernsteinIn Judgment Detox I give you six meditations to practice each morning, six days in a row. Once you’ve practiced each one in order, you can practice them interchangeably or focus on the one that resonates with you most.

It’s an amazing experience that will give you significant relief.

If you’re brand-new to meditation, the awesome news is that you can jump right in and start now! There are no prerequisites. You can simply start meditating. Trust that you were led to this blog and this book for a reason, and let it be your introduction to meditation. (You can also check out my beginner’s guide to meditation for an overview and some easy meditations.)

Meditation has the capacity to transform all your relationships, including your relationship to yourself. When you tune in to the energy of love through your meditation practice, you invite an invisible force of love to take over. In the presence of that love, the past can fade away and the energetic cords of judgment can dissolve.

We have energetic cords connecting us to other people

We all have energetic cords tying us to people all over the world. Sometimes we have cord connections to people we don’t even know. You might have a cord connection to a celebrity or to someone you met only once!

When you have any kind of relationship with someone, your energy becomes connected, especially when a strong emotional event occurs between you. Energy cords can also be created when we make a contract or a promise.

Through meditation we slow down our mind and reorganize our energy to clear space for our inner guidance | cord cutting meditationEven when that relationship ends, the energy cord can still be intact. This is particularly true in situations where you’re thinking negative, judgmental thoughts about that person. Your judgment creates a cord that ties you to them, whether you like it or not.

Our cords stay intact even when relationships end

Even when you think a relationship is over, you will still feel the pain and drama because those strong energetic ties can make you feel drained, tired and even upset. That’s why it can be so hard to stop thinking about an ex or stop obsessing over a business deal that went wrong.

Physical separation is not always enough to end a negative connection. Often you need to clear it on a spiritual level in order to let go of the relationship and find closure.

Not only does a negative connection make you feel crappy, it blocks your ability to attract what you want! When you have a cord attachment to someone you’ve judged, you’re stuck in a low-frequency relationship. That negativity lowers the vibration you put out. As a result, you attract people and situations that match that low-level vibration.

This is where the Cord-Cutting Meditation comes in.

You can heal negative energy through meditation

The great news is that you can heal your cord attachments through a simple meditation! This practice is so powerful for healing judgment. It allows you to let go and get closure from a past relationship.

Tweet: When you tune in to the energy of love through your meditation practice, you invite an invisible force of love to take over. @gabbybernstein #judgmentdetox

In this post I’m sharing one of my favorite guided meditations with you. It’s the Cord-Cutting Meditation, the first meditation in Step 5 of Judgment Detox. It sends a clear message to the Universe that you’re ready to let go of judgment.

You can practice this Cord-Cutting Meditation to clear negative energy that ties you to anyone. It’s not only for past relationships. If you currently resent someone in your life, this meditation will help you release that feeling.

You can do this meditation by following my guidance in the video below. This video is from The Judgment Detox Digital Course.

Guided Cord-Cutting Meditation

I recommend grabbing a notebook or journal so you can write about your experience afterward.

When you’re ready to meditate, simply press play, close your eyes and listen to my Cord-Cutting Meditation.

When you’ve finished the meditation, pick up your notebook and begin to write about your experience. How did this meditation make you feel?

Free-write in your journal for five minutes without editing or second-guessing yourself.

Learn more about the Judgment Detox Digital Course!

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  1. Gabby, thank you for your work, I have been reading your articles for a long time and they give me an inspiration to move forward after a divorce!

    1. If you’re not already doing so, we would recommend seeing a therapist. This is a wonderful action in self-care. Gabby shares that she would not be where she is right now if it weren’t for her therapist. You may also find it useful to attend a support group, even if it’s online. is a great government resource. They have a free, confidential helpline that is available 24/7. The number is 1-800-662-4357. This service provides referrals to local treatment facilities, support groups, and community-based organizations. You can also order free publications and other information.


      1. Is this ocd ? I thought its just over-thinking,living in past.
        also ex, when I return home at evening, whole day’s people’s conversations play in my head . Is this ocd or not living in present moment ?

        1. Only a specialist would be able to answer this question for you, Asha. To some extent, we all reflect about our past experiences. In addition to the cord cutting meditation, here are some additional practices that you might find helpful:

          If you’re unable to let go or create a shift, like you mentioned in your earlier comment, it could be helpful to seek individualized care.

  2. Dear Gabby,
    I‘m struggling a lot with the fact that i‘ve been a conciously terrible energy sucking abusive person the past 1 1/2 years to literally all people in my close and far surrounding, especially to my mother.
    It feels that i have been really violent towards her, others (and overal myself).
    I don’t really know how to integrate this experience, knowing that i am able to consiously abuse my fecundity tu hurt and harm others while knowing that this is not what i am supposed to do.
    I feel that there is still so much hate, anger and negativity inside of me, but also a readiness to change again (finally).
    Is there something you can advice me on how to integrate this experience and restore things?

    1. Thank you for your honest share, Stephanie. Showing up and sharing here is a sign that you’re willing to experience meaningful change. If you’re not already doing so, we would recommend seeing a therapist, perhaps one that specializes in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. This is a wonderful action in self-care. Gabby shares that she would not be where she is right now if it weren’t for her therapist. You may also find it useful to attend a support group for anger management.
      In the meantime, you may also want to check out these blog posts on releasing judgment:
      You may also find it helpful to practice daily meditation:
      Sending you big love as you continue on your healing journey.

  3. I’m 3 days after a breakup that has me in unbearable pain and regret. The pain is so acute…is there ANY meditation for something so very painful so that I can move on …and sleep?

  4. Hi Gabby. Thank you for all your wonderful work. I used this meditation to cut a cord with someone who has been incessantly calling and trying to connect with me for two years. She’s mentally ill and when she tries to get in touch it feels as though she’s energetically trying to put her hands inside me and pull everything out and put it inside herself. It’s such an odd feeling. A few friends who’ve been around to witness her approach me say they can feel this as well but have also felt the huge thick wall that I put up to keep her away. When I read about the meditation I realized although I feel I need to protect myself from her that through my judgements of her there is probably a cord. Doing the meditation there it was for sure going right into my stomach from hers. It felt like she was sucking things through it, or trying to. Here’s what I wanted to ask: after the cord was cut she collapsed and seemed to dematerialize. She then appeared again but on her knees, crying with her face in her hands. I could feel the Shame and anguish radiating off of her. My first thought was to help her although I know this is one of the most toxic people I’ve ever encountered. The instruction was to “see the person in their innocence and light”. Why did she appear this way and what does it mean? Thank you for any insight you may have. Love and gratitude to you Gabby for all the help you put out into the world.

    1. Karen, thank you for sharing about your experience. Seeing this woman in her innocence may have given you a glimpse of the shame and anguish she feels and allowed you to understand that she is not malicious or intentionally toxic. That being said, in order for you to feel safe it sounds like you cannot have her in your life. That is a healthy and loving boundary to draw. You can trust that by energetically releasing the negativity between you, you have given her a release as well. In fact she may have been letting go of some anguish and shame as a result of your own meditation. Your meditation has served both of you.

  5. While I was looking at all the options trying to decide which one I should try, my cell phone fell on my keyboard and it landed directing me to the exact meditation I needed. Cutting the cord. WOW

  6. It’s important for me to get closure from any relationship that hasn’t worked out because I fall deeply in love, fast.

    I got my heart broken by my ex around 8 months ago and I haven’t fully managed to get over him, and because we haven’t had proper closure, deep within me, I believe we still have a chance (but I think the reality is, we don’t.)

    It’s sad, but yes, absolutely, I believe everyone should receive closure in a relationship for sure.


  7. Hi Gabby,

    I just tried this, and I could envision the love of my life, who just ended our relationship, and I started crying. An immense sadness came over me. I met the love of my life after my divorce, but he decided that he didn’t want to be a stepdad. It has broken me. I never shed a tear when I was going through my divorce, and my love came to me unexpected one day, and we both fell madly in love with each other. He knew I had kids, and we tried to make it work. But he kept pulling away when it came time to engage more with my kids. I know this should be a done deal because my kids come first. I agree. But my heart is still broken to lose someone I deeply love. We had no other issues in our relationship. We got along great. I’m truly struggling with getting on without him. I’ve been listening to your books and talking to the Universe as you suggest. I just don’t know if it’s working.

    1. Sending you lots of love and healing Kristina. You’re doing amazing work. Please be patient and gentle with yourself during this time. I invite you to start incorporating daily acts of self love and self care. Sometimes we forget to do this on a regular basis and now is the perfect time to start again. Every day ask yourself what is something loving and nurturing you can do to feel joy, even something small. Being in your joy and allowing spaciousness will help you see the healing shifts. <3

  8. Thank you so much for this meditation. It was both easy and devastatingly hard to envision them in front of me, knowing what was about to happen. I wasnt feeling anger or resentment, but instead profound grief and I had to literally swing that emotional sword in the air in order to cut the cord that I dont want, but need severed. I’m learning that in order to move forward, I have to cut those ties, even the ones I wish above all wishes to be repaired or that I could manifest them back into my life when we’re both healthier. The instant it was cut, and the floodgates opened, I was able to see their innocence, their sweetness, and even with the cord cut, they were still in my minds eye, and it didnt feel so much like a turning away or a goodbye, but rather an ‘i love you and respect you’ and wish you healing. Thank you so so much for your books, videos, and instruction. You have profoundly impacted my ability to heal.

  9. I’m in the process of divorce that is not my decision. Iv had a hard time letting go but I did get a sense of relief after it was over. I started bawling the moment the meditation said to “ imagine them in front of you.”
    Is that normal? That kind of saddens? It’s such a process and some days I don’t think it will ever be over.
    Thank you for your book Universe HasYour Back. I’m re reading and will start Judgement Detox soon.
    Sat nam, Angie

    1. It is normal. Rest assured it is normal. You experienced an emotional release. Healing our judgment and letting go of relationships can be hard emotional work at times, but I want you to know without a doubt that you are supported. Let the tears flow when they come. You are supported. It will get easier. Sat Nam sister.

  10. So grateful for this! The timing was perfect for me- I am working the steps and just finished step 4. This is such a blessing as a way to help clear some of those resentments and unhealthy connections..

    Blessings to you!

  11. Thank you for the meditation. It came at the right time. I did feel some strong emotions which I did not expect. Alittle concerning actually because I didn’t foresee the same to happen. Can you recommend your book that may help me to accept my ex’s decision and move forward?

  12. I unexpectedly began to sob as I saw my ex husband holding the black cord that was wrapped several times around my heart. We still co-parent two daughters so I hope this will help me see him more clearly and without judgement

    1. I’m so happy to hear this meditation served you. If it resonates with you, you can make it a 40-day practice. Sending you love + light.

    1. You can cut the negative energy cord and begin to heal the toxicity of that relationship. Tapping on your judgment can also bring you great relief. However, if you are working in a toxic place and are being treated badly by your boss, the healthiest and most empowering thing for you to do may be to leave that job. I understand it’s not always as easy as it sounds, but if you ask for guidance and take spiritually aligned action it very well may become clear to you that you need to leave that situation. You don’t have to quit immediately, but you can begin taking steps to leave that situation. For now you can also begin speaking up in compassionate but firm ways about what you need at work in order to do your job well and thrive. Get very clear about what you need and what you want and take action toward co-creating that reality, knowing the Universe has your back.

  13. Just finished May Cause Miricles and been working on my commitment to loving everyone and becoming more aware of my judgement. The cord cutting meditation brought me instant relief over an ex who brought up so much ego based fear “i am not enough” during the meditation i woke up light not personalizing his behaviors as a reflection of my worth but a reflection of his ego based fears keeping him blocked from the light of love in him. i love all that you do in brining so many people spiritual/energetic connection. i committed tonight to wake tomorrow and start the Judgement Detox. I am almost 10 years sober and have never felt more connected to my relationship with a “higher power” until your book crossed my path a year ago.

    1. This comment makes my heart swell!! I am so happy to know May Cause Miracles and this meditation are serving you in such big ways. I want to honor you for doing the work and being committed to your spiritual path. xo

  14. This is only my second time meditating and I want to thank you for sharing that exercise. I felt an overwhelming amount of emotions after meditating with the cord cutting but also felt a sense of relief while I was writing .thank you and thank you April for sharing.

  15. This is only my second time meditating and I want to thank you for sharing that exercise. I felt an overwhelming amount of emotions after meditating with the cord cutting but also felt a sense of relief while I was writing .thank you and thank you April for sharing.

  16. The universe was definitely guiding me when this popped up in my email. Not being able to get rid of these thoughts about an ex, I have cycles of thought and signs regarding this person pop up everywhere. It can be overwhelming so much so that I have had my own inner voice say to me “he’ll come back to you if you let him go.” But here’s the thing, I haven’t fully let go and that is where I am grateful for this meditation. I want to heal… Something I am going to have to practice again in healing the cord. It is insane how strong cords can become even after knowing someone for a short period of time.

    Thank you Gabby for this and helping part of my healing.

    1. I am so proud of you for your willingness to heal. This takes real courage. Know that you are supported and held by the love of the Universe.

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