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how to manifest love

Whether we realize it or not, we all resist love. When we clear the blocks to love, we clear our path to manifesting and attract a life of joy, connection, ease and unshakable peace. 

So how do you clear the blocks to love? How can you manifest love?

That’s what I talk about in this bonus episode of the Dear Gabby podcast. It’s from a live talk I gave in Los Angeles back in the day. I’ll share the 5 steps you can use to clear the blocks to love and manifest the life you dream of. 

But before you do that, I’ll ask you to take an honest look at the ways in which you’re stuck in resistance. 

You might be thinking, “How am I resisting love?” 

recognize your resistance

Our resistance shows up in unique ways. Maybe you’re in a romantic relationship and you sabotage it because you’re afraid that if the other person leaves, you will not survive. I’ve actually experienced this in past relationships.

Maybe your resistance is a never-ending story that plays in your head, telling you there’s an issue you need to fix. This was a major block for me.

We resist our manifestations through attack thoughts, judgment, separation and jealousy. Whenever we look at someone and think, “I should have what they have,” or we make fun of them, or we gossip about them … we are resisting love. 

we all resist love, but we might not be conscious of it

When we resist love, we are resisting oneness and we are resisting light. 

That’s why it was so important for me to share this live talk with you. It will reveal to you what you still need to heal so you can clear the blocks to love. This talk will bring you great relief.  

clear the blocks to manifest love

Love is your true nature. It’s who you are. You might have just forgotten. 

But there is a proven path you can take to clear the blocks to love, and I’ll share it with you today. 

gabby on stage

In this inspirational episode, I’ll reveal steps to strengthen your spiritual alignment, let go of doubt, fear and resistance, and return to love. Here’s an overview of the 5 steps: 

Step 1

be grateful for the tough stuff

This will help you compassionately witness the hidden parts of your shadow that you still need to heal. 

Step 2

give off the right signal

You will create more of what you feel. When you are in an energy of joy, magnitude and grace, more of it will flow into your life. 

Step 3

examine how you defend your illusions

We defend our illusions when we direct our focus onto what we DON’T want. Everything shifts when we actively redirect our attention to the things that we DO want. 

Step 4

remember that kindness created you kind

Choose to see others’ pain, fear and struggles as your own. As humans who share this planet, we’re all in it together. Kindness is the solution for all our suffering.

Step 5

when you think you’ve surrendered, surrender some more

The steps to spiritual surrender are the final steps you must take to release all that’s blocking you. These are the steps: Take your hands off the wheel, turn over time and give up the outcome.

love more & heal more

This Dear Gabby will help you remember how amazing it is to dwell in peace, how wonderful it is to choose joy, and how liberating it is to give up your grievances and forgive. 

That is how you clear the blocks to love. 

When you remove everything that is in the way of the presence of love within you, you can grow more, heal more and love more.

You can experience joy in every moment.

gabby

And you can know with unwavering certainty that the Universe has your back. 

get more gabby

free manifesting meditation to attract your desires

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disclaimer

This podcast is intended to educate, inspire, and support you on your personal journey towards inner peace. I am not a psychologist or a medical doctor and do not offer any professional health or medical advice. If you are suffering from any psychological or medical conditions, please seek help from a qualified health professional.

dear gabby #105 Dec 16, 2022 purpose 50 min

5 methods to clear your path to manifesting

Listen on:

The following podcast is a Dear Media production.

Do you want more guidance on building a spiritual practice that you can stick to? I think the answer has to be yes because you’re sitting here right now listening to Dear Gabby looking for spiritual guidance, looking for support. And I find that often when people want to feel like they’re being coached by someone, what they want most is to be told what to do.

Because so many of us walk around how do I feel better? How can I make my life better? How can I manifest more? How can I heal my past? But we are often just trying to figure it all out. But wouldn’t it be nice if someone just figured it all out for you?

Well, I did. And I did it with my Miracle Membership. My Miracle Membership is like having me as your coach in your inbox and on your phone at all times. You will get weekly emails with me with weekly lessons. So you’re gonna get meditations, a lesson with a PDF worksheet, a community, guidance, mantras—it’s just incredible.

Plus, every three months, I’ll lead you in one of my 21-Day Challenges. The Manifesting Challenge is in January. The Meditation Challenge is in April. The Relationship Challenge is coming up. The Body Love Challenge is coming up. We have so many amazing perks that come with this membership.

So, in between each challenge, I’m going to consistently keep you going with my weekly coaching emails and giving you clear direction on how to live your life every single day. It’s an easy-to-follow outline. It’s week-by-week. It’s meditations, affirmations, lessons and worksheets plus hundreds of hours of content inside your portal that have helped so many people manifest, reduce anxiety, help people improve relationships—everything.

When you have a spiritual practice, you make your well-being your highest priority. You’ll feel empowered, guided. You’re gonna feel inspired. You become a Super Attractor! And you start to effortlessly manifest what you desire.

And best of all, you don’t have to figure it out anymore. I can show you the way. Go to deargabby.com/miraclemembership to join. That’s deargabby.com/miraclemembership.

Hey there. Welcome to Dear Gabby. I’m your host Gabby Bernstein. And if you landed here, it is absolutely no accident. It means you’re ready to feel good and manifest a life beyond your wildest dreams. Let’s get started.

Welcome back to Dear Gabby. What a day here, what a day. I am sitting in my studio, reflecting on some experiences from 15 years ago, maybe 16 years now. It’s crazy. Sitting in my studio apartment in New York City, listening to Sigur Ros, that awesome music, Sigur Ros, and I’m sitting there meditating and I’m feeling my hands go numb.

And I’m feeling this energy moving through me and I’m getting major messages from spirit and I’m so elevated. And I’m just feeling that shift sitting there for an hour, moving into two hours. And heading out to dinner with some friends coming back meditating before I go to bed and just opening up my conscious awareness to this presence of spiritual guidance.

I became so obsessed with that meditation practice. I was such a spirit junkie. I mean, I still am such a spirit junkie and that practice that I developed so strongly at that time has carried me through my entire life. It’s carried me through addiction recovery. It’s carried me through recovering traumatic memories and healing.

It’s carried me through the relief from healing postpartum depression. It’s carried me through the recent loss I’ve had with my son. It’s carried me. It’s carried me. It’s carried me. It’s been a presence and a friend by my side. And I’ve practiced lots of different types of meditations throughout my life.

I’ve been really clear about my main practice, which is transcendental meditation. And then for many years I was practicing and studying Kundalini meditation and sharing that and still lean on those practices in specific moments. Cause they’re very topical and practical and so, so easy to just tap into.

And most recently really using bilateral music from my meditation and my meditation journey has continuously grown as I have grown. It has developed, it has strengthened. It has been such a powerful practice. And even this morning, I just lay down in my bed before I opened my eyes before my son woke up.

Placed my hand on my heart, my hand on my belly and just listened and breathed and started to see images and started noticing direction and feeling guided. And most importantly, just feeling soothed by my inner sense of safety and that inner place of self-energy, that connection, that compassion, that loving voice within me.

And that’s what meditation is. It’s actually a bridge from our ego, the outside world, all over the protector, parts of us, the ways that we numb out, play small, the ways that we run and hide, back to the source of self within us, that calm, compassionate, inner parent that we all have. And when we meditate, we are guided back to that sense of Self. With a capital S.

This episode is brought to you by Better Help online therapy. Relationships take a lot of work, especially the most important one that you can have in your life, which is your relationship to yourself. So this month, Better Help online therapy wants to remind you that you are what matters most.

I always like to refer to that beautiful metaphor of, we have to put the oxygen mask on ourselves first, and that means that we have to take an honest inventory of what we need to help ourselves feel supported. And that’s why I absolutely love this sponsor Better Help. And I’m a huge advocate of therapy. Better Help is the world’s largest therapy service that’s 100% online.

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It’s only been a few weeks and I have gained a lot of insight and tools to help me heal. I feel like 2022 will be a great year. That is just absolutely stunning. I’m so happy to hear that testimonial. And I love knowing that the sponsors of Dear Gabby are helping you feel supported on your journey.

Therapy has supported my life every step of the way. In fact, when I launched my new book, Happy Days, I said to my therapist, because she’s such a huge character in the book. I said, who do you think is going to play you in the movie? So I really, really can’t say enough about what it means to have the privilege of having someone support you on your journey to personal development and growth.

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This podcast is sponsored by Better Help. And Dear Gabby listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com/deargabby that’s B E T T E R H E L P.com/deargabby.

And so I reached out to you guys on my social media, and I asked you for questions about meditation because right now we’re starting my meditation challenge.

My 21-day meditation challenge. It’s starting on April 1st. And when you take that journey of the meditation challenge it’s such a commitment to yourself to say yes to freedom inside, that inner freedom. It’s a commitment to say yes to feeling better. It’s a commitment to your family, your loved ones, because you raise your vibration, your energy literally elevates and you start to show up for the world in a much bigger way.

And so when we make that statement, yes, I’m ready to meditate for 21 days with Gabby. Let me have her as my coach. You’re really signing a sacred contract with a universe that you’re ready to go big. And all the details are in the show notes. You can go check it out - Deargabby.com/meditationchallenge. But I asked you guys, what do you want to know about meditation?

Because I wanted to dedicate this entire episode to really Dear Gabbying your questions. And so here we are. I just have your questions. I have no preparation has ever, I never have prepped for these. I just have a little outline of what we’re going to talk about. So I just want to speak extemporaneously about this practice.

It has changed me forever and a practice that will be something that can be by your side for a lifetime if you choose it. So let’s start with my first question. Dear Gabby, how do I even start meditating? Boom. What a good place to begin! Here we go.

Well, one resource would be definitely get into the meditation challenge because it’s going to meet you where you are, whether you’re a longtime meditator or it’s your first time ever doing it.

But today here’s how you begin right here. Right now. As long as you’re not driving. I just want you to sit up straight, whether you’re on a chair or cross-legged on the floor and place your palms facing upward. Just notice any area of your body, where there may be any tension or anxiety or frustration or blocks. Gently take a deep breath and breathing into that space in your body. On the exhale let it go.

Take another deep breath in and breathe into that area of your body, where you’re holding on to any discomfort, and on the exhale, let it go. Breathing in and notice that area in your body and just breathe into that space, and on the exhale, let it go. Take one more deep breath in. And release it. And when you’re ready, open your eyes.

There’s your answer. That’s how you start. You just meditated. How do you feel? Let me know in the show notes, what you feel. It’s like, you know, we just did a thirty-second meditation. What did that feel like? That’s a good place to start—tapping in with your body. Where do you feel tension and breathing into that space in your body and then on the exhale, letting it go.

If you can do that for two minutes in the morning or three minutes in the morning, you’re grounding yourself in meditation. Major, major, major.

The next question is awesome. What are your top three tips for beginners? If you’re a newbie to meditation, there’s three things I would highly recommend. One is be uninterruptible.

So if you’re going to sit down and you’re going to make a commitment to meditate, make sure your phone’s off. Make sure your computer is not dinging. Make sure your children are in the other room with a good, you have a good 15 minutes of space. If not more, just grounding yourself in a space that’s uninterruptible. Be comfortable as well, physically comfortable.

A lot of people say, oh, I can’t lie down if I’m meditating, that’s like a big rule in meditation. I think that’s a bunch of bullshit. I think you could absolutely lie down if it’s going to be soothing to your body. I wouldn’t lie down to fall asleep, but maybe lie back, get comfortable, cover yourself with a blanket. Make sure you’re warm. Connected. That would be the second tip.

And then the third tip, so the first one’s uninterruptible, the second tip is to be comfortable. And the third tip is use your breath because so many of us our brain is taking over. But once you lean into breath, breath can begin to soothe your entire nervous system. Breath is a point of focus. Breath is a direct access to another focal point rather than your thoughts.

So if you’re breathing in for five, holding for five out for five in for 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, hold 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 release 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. That practice alone has the power to completely transform you because you’re focusing on the counting and the breathing, which takes you away from the thinking. Really cool. Really simple.

So let me recap those steps. Find a place where you’re uninterruptible be comfortable, focus on your breath. Use that five in five, hold five out. There you go. Simple meditation in for five hold for five out for five.

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It’s been really helping me stay alert all day long and I drink it after days of podcasting. And I’m just really, really, really focused and productive. Also, it contains minimal caffeine, all of which comes from matcha tea. And, you know, I love sponsors that I believe in and that’s this brand because they use all-natural ingredients.

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If you’re a regular listener of the show, you know, that taking care of my gut is one of my biggest priorities. The gut is connected to everything. Probiotics are something that I take daily and I won’t miss a day of my probiotics because they help me keep my gut healthy. If you’re looking for something to support your digestive health, this product is for you.

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There’s a lot of probiotics out there and this one is legit, people. Some of them won’t be doing anything for you. And if you’ve taken a probiotic before, and never felt a difference, it’s because the good bacteria wasn’t surviving in your GI tract. And so Seed is designed differently and that’s why it works so well.

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It’s really incredible. I also love their chic little travel glass vial that I’ve been using a lot lately as I’m on my book tour. So start a new healthy habit today. Visit Seed.com/deargabby and use code Dear Gabby to redeem 20% off your first month of Seed’s Daily Symbiotic; that’s S E E D.com/deargabby and use code Dear Gabby.

How to calm my monkey mind during meditation. Dear Gabby. How do I calm my monkey mind during meditation? Boom. Boom, boom. Love that one. Well, here’s the thing. A lot of people think that when they’re meditating, they have to push their thoughts away or know, just shut them up. That’s actually completely not the case.

We want to notice the thought and then return to the breath or notice the thought and maybe return to a mantra. I think if you do have a lot of thoughts during meditation, a mantra-based meditation can be very helpful for you. So what is a mantra? Much like your breath. It’s a single-pointed focus. So if you notice that your mind is just going crazy, you’ve got lots of thoughts and you just can’t keep them from relaxing or stepping aside, just gently notice the thought and you can even just be gentle with it. Okay. There you are. My thoughts. Thank you for showing up. I know you have something to reveal to me and then just gently return back to your mantra.

And the mantra could be simple as a Satnam, which is truth is my name or so hum. I am that or just repeating I am that; I am love. Repeating that mantra, any mantra. So hum, Satnam, whatever feels resonant for you and just keep repeating the mantra and then your mind’s going to go wander. And then you just come back to the mantra and then your mind’s going to wander again. And then you return back to the mantra and you just come, keep coming back gently, just guiding yourself back to the mantra.

That mantra is a single-pointed focus that leads you back to peace. And when you really give yourself permission to just lean into that mantra, five minutes will become 10 minutes. 10 minutes will become 15 minutes. 15 minutes will become 20 minutes. Very similar to a transcendental meditation practice, a mantra-based meditation practice.

In TM, you’re given a mantra. You have to go through the training, you get a mantra. And then when you have your mantra, you just meditate two times a day. Repeating that mantra over and over. You could start that and you do that for 20 minutes, two times a day. For a newbie, just start with a mantra like Satnam — truth is my name.

And just repeat it, Satnam, Satnam. You can even find peace in your pulse. Like this is a great Kundalini method. Put your hand on your wrist and just relax and notice your pulse. And as you feel into your pulse, you feel that pulse coming and going, repeat the mantra. Satnam, Satnam, Satnam. And just repeat it as you hold your pulse, you could find your pulse on your neck or on your wrist, peace is in your pulse.

Very good one for newcomers. And that returning to the mantra is a very gentle way of letting go of the thinking mind, the monkey mind. But what’s also so cool about that is there’s nothing wrong with thinking a lot in your meditation because that’s just means it’s an active meditation. It means that you’re working something out.

It’s just getting moved through. And if you gently keep returning to your breath and your mantra, you can relax those thoughts and just let them move through naturally, rather than overthinking, there’s nothing wrong with your thoughts. You don’t want to push them away or judge them. You just want to breathe in and return to the month.

How I love this question. Dear Gabby, what type of meditation helps when someone you’re around always brings your vibe down? Whew. Meditation for energy protection. So this is something I like to do. I would like to step away from that relationship as quickly as you can, and find yourself in that uninterruptible, comfortable space and start with a prayer which is…

Thank you, universe. Thank you, God. Or thank you, love energy—whatever you believe in—for removing any negative energy I may have picked up and for retrieving any positive energy I may have lost. Boom. That prayer sets you up. And then allow yourself to go into a meditation where you visualize with every inhale you’re retrieving any energy that you might’ve lost. And with every exhale you’re letting go of any energy that is not serving you.

Inhale that vision of light energy, exhale a vision of gray vibrational energy. Inhale light, exhale gray. Inhale light, exhale gray. And eventually, you’ll start noticing that gray starts to transform into light. Breathing in that light exhaling light, extending that light. Inhale light, extend light because you literally want to visualize, like you’re cleansing yourself, bringing in that light and letting go of anything that’s gray and releasing any of that negative energy that might be holding you back from being comfortable, free, steady, and at ease. Big one.

Dear Gabby, how do you know if you’re doing it right? I love this question. You know, you’re meditating, right? There’s no right or wrong way. When you feel relaxed, when you come out of your meditation and you feel energized and at ease and released of tension, relaxed in your mind, relaxed in your body, more centered, more grounded. You know that your meditations are working when you are less reactive.

When you just feel like you have a steadiness about you, your body starts to reap the benefits of meditation because when you calm your nervous system and stimulate the vagus nerve, which regulates the entire nervous system, your whole body can settle. And in that settled state, you feel a great sense of relief in your mind and your body. Physical back pain starts to release your shoulders, your hips, your stomach.

You sleep better. There’s so many great benefits of having a meditation practice.

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Modern fertility gets you the same info at $159, which is a fraction of the price. And if you go to modernfertility.com/gabby, you can get $20 off your first test. The traditional guidance with fertility has been just, just wait and see. Oh my God. Take it from me guys. I had my first child at 39 years old. Don’t just wait and see. Please take this seriously.

You’ll get insight into your hormone levels. Your ovarian reserve, AKA how many eggs you have. And if you don’t like the results you want to get at it, maybe you freeze your eggs or maybe you get going in the bed, whatever you need to do, but it’s important to really have the information.

The results go deep into what every hormone means. You can also talk one-on-one with a fertility nurse to review results and options for next steps. And if you want children today or maybe one day in the future, clinically-sound information about your body can help you make the decision that’s right.

Right now Modern Fertility is offering our listeners $20 off the test when you go to modernfertility.com/gabby. That means your test will cost $139 iInstead of the hundreds or thousands, it could cost at a doctor’s office. Get $20 off your fertility test when you go to modernfertility.com/gabby. Modernfertility.com/gabby.

Next question, here we go. Dear Gabby, s it normal to see colors while meditating?

Totally. So the more you develop your meditation practice, the more intuitive you become because remember meditation is the bridge from the ego’s monkey mind to the energy of self within you. Self is intuitive. Self is creative. Self is loving. Self is profoundly connected. And so when you bridge from ego to self and you come back to that seat of self and that presence of God and love and self within you, you start to become a clear channel to receive spiritual guidance.

And in that space of receiving spiritual guidance, you open up your connection to what is known as mediumship, your channel. You can begin to see images. You can see colors, you can see something that may be a directive message for you. You can hear audibly, or you can hear intuitively, you can get messages for yourself and others.

And that’s just one of the benefits to become a clear, intuitive force. If you want to do a creative project, like write a book or create some art or do anything creative meditate first, because what happens when you meditate is you open up the channel to receive divine wisdom. Oh, it’s such a powerful way to do this.

And so many people who have gone through the 21-day Meditation Challenge have revealed to me that not only do they feel better and look better and feel more grounded and connected, but they also started channeling. They also started receiving more inspired ideas. Their creative endeavors got really amplified.

Many people came out of that challenge and they wrote a book or come out of that challenge and created art. So much creativity comes out of that practice. So yes, you can see colors.

Dear Gabby, how to meditate when it feels so vulnerable as a trauma survivor. Oh, my love. Well, first of all, I hope you’re reading Happy Days, and I have a lot of meditations in that book that are really about grounding your body and getting connected to your body.

Because when you have trauma, you disconnect from the body, you leave your body literally. And your soul departs. And so the best body-based meditations are shared in Happy Days. I’ll share some with you now that are just about grounding you in your presence, in your physical body to grounding your feet, grounding your energy.

So I love the Heart Hold, placing your hand on your heart. And your other hand on your belly, whichever hand on the heart feels most grounding for you and feel your seat under your butt and the floor under your seat. And then feel into the building under the floor. All that’s holding the building up, notice the ground, that’s holding up the structure and the earth beneath the ground and feel that grounding energy, visualize it.

And with your hand on your heart, in this grounded state, just breathe in. I am safe and on the exhale, I am safe. Breathing in. I am safe. Exhale. I am safe. Breathing in. I am safe. And on the exhale, I am safe. If you commit to making your meditation practice, grounding and soothing, then you don’t have to worry about over-activating yourself because the point and the focus is to get grounded, feel at ease and relax your nervous system.

In that relaxed state, you are safe. You’ve created a baseline of safety in your body that will help you stay connected and aligned. This is such a beautiful topic. I want to do this more where you guys just throw me some questions about meditation.

And the last question was Dear Gabby, what are the benefits of daily meditation practice?

My daily meditation practice has saved my life and given me life. It has allowed me to stay grounded and connected as a priority. Sometimes when I have a busy day and I’ve missed my daily meditation, I’ll ask for help. I’ll say to my husband, can you take Ollie for 20 minutes so I can just go upstairs, lie on my mat, my PMF mat, and just meditate and relax and soothe my system.

We have the power in any moment to redirect our energy field, calm our nervous system, and the benefits are so great. Calming your mind. Relaxing your body, releasing stress and anxiety, regulating your nervous system, releasing tension, physical tension, restoring your physical symptoms to be at ease.

Releasing those psychosomatic symptoms from the pressure that they take on of all the stress, letting the body naturally heal. You become more present in your life. With your loved ones, you feel more connected, grounded, and steady. And my prayer is to give you the creative possibilities that meditation offers.

And the absolute best way I can serve you in reigniting a meditation practice, starting a meditation practice, amplifying your existing practice is through the 21-day meditation challenge. I really hope you guys join. It starts April 1st. This is your moment to get in.

Just head over to deargabby.com/meditationchallenge. Know that I will be there by your side, guiding you every step of the way. It’s such an honor to be able to speak with authority about these practices because these are practices that have changed my life.

They’ve given me life and I’m ready to give them to you. So open your heart and your mind to what this could be and just say, yes, I’m ready to go big and ready to go in and to go home. We go back to our truth when we’re grounded in our meditation practice. So excited to see you guys in the challenge. Deargabby.com/meditationchallenge.

Practice any one of the methods that I just gave you here today, leave me a message inside the reviews. Let me know how it went. How was your practice? Let me know. I love reading your reviews. Absolutely magnificent.

I feel at ease, even talking about this, I love you guys. Enjoy your meditation.

If you made it to the end of this episode, that means you’re truly committed to miracles. I’m really proud of you. If you want to get more Gabby, tune in every Monday for a new episode. Make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss any of the guidance or special bonus episodes. Your experience at this show means a lot to me.

So I really want to welcome you to leave an honest review and you can follow me on social media at @GabbyBernstein. And if you want to get in on the action, sign up for a chance to be Dear Gabby’d live deargabby.com. See you next week.