Have you ever dreamed of a loved one who’s passed and woken up feeling like you were truly with them? That question is at the heart of dream visitations from deceased loved ones, and it’s exactly what my friend and psychic medium MaryAnn DiMarco and I dig into on this episode of Dear Guides.
We explore the many ways our loved ones connect with us through dreams, signs, symbols, meditation, and our own intuition. We talk about how to interpret a message without overthinking it, what to do when a dream feels like a warning, why grief can make that connection feel harder to reach, and how forgiveness can help heal our relationships with the people we’ve lost. MaryAnn also guides us through her powerful Request, Receive, Record practice, designed to help you invite a loved one into your dreams and create the space to receive their presence and their message tonight.
What Is a Dream Visitation From a Deceased Loved One?
MaryAnn describes it as a moment with your loved one from the other side, not a memory or your imagination replaying an old scene, but an actual meeting in the middle ground between this world and the next.
“They’re meeting you in the middle between this world and that world,” MaryAnn told me, “and saying, hey, what’s up.”
Why Deceased Loved Ones Reach You Through Dreams
I asked MaryAnn why dreams specifically, instead of showing up while we’re awake and paying attention. Her answer: dream state is the one part of the day when we’re not paying too much attention. During the day we’re busy, overthinking, running our to-do list, maybe even actively looking for a sign and second-guessing every one we get. In dream state, we’re suspended between the here and the there, and that’s exactly the frequency where connection happens most easily.
The Veil Is Thinner While You Sleep
When we’re awake, it can feel like a thick blanket between us and the spiritual realm, especially when our minds are racing. The second we start drifting off, we drop into a state of non-resistance. We stop worrying, we stop ruminating, and rest becomes an open door.
Signs a Dream Is a Real Visitation, Not Just a Regular Dream
This is the question I hear the most, so let’s make it simple. A few markers to look for:
- Unusual vividness, more like a memory forming than a dream.
- Your loved one looks healthy, at ease, or younger than you remember them.
- You wake up feeling like you were actually with them, not just thinking about them.
- A distinct tone of comfort or calm, rather than the strange randomness of a normal dream.
- Details you couldn’t have known, or wouldn’t typically dream up on your own.
Why They Often Appear Younger, Healthier, or Happier
Your loved ones are fine on the other side, and they tend to show up that way in dreams, at their healthiest, not as they were at the end of an illness. That’s not wishful editing on your part. It’s them showing you the truth of where they are now.
What Deceased Loved Ones Are Usually Trying to Tell You
Most of the time, they’re not delivering information. They’re delivering comfort.
“Most of the time, your loved ones are coming in for comfort. They’re coming in to tell you: I am still with you.”
MaryAnn was clear that you shouldn’t go reaching for a message. Let it come, and relax into just being with them, without straining for meaning.
Sometimes there is a specific message, delivered through the smallest detail. MaryAnn told me about a dream where her deceased father-in-law showed up wearing a blue shirt that matched his blue eyes and told her, “Don’t worry about the eyes.” She had no idea what it meant until she learned her mother-in-law’s other son was having eye surgery that same week.
When the Message Is Symbolic, Not Literal
Pay attention to the scenario, not just the words. A specific color, an object, another person nearby, a butterfly. Notice how your loved one structured the dream, sit with it, and translate it in whatever way feels most intuitive to you. You are the best person to interpret the symbols in these dreams.
What It Means When a Visitation Dream Feels Like a Warning
This is where people get scared, and I understand why. A lot of visitation dreams carry a heaviness that feels like distress or danger. MaryAnn’s advice: pause, and go for the most positive interpretation available.
Spirit uses your frame of reference to reach you, so if your own frequency is low, in grief or fear, the message comes through your emotions on the way in. That doesn’t mean your loved one is distressed. It means you might be.
“They are highlighting our inner knowing. They are not telling us what to do.”
She estimates that ninety-nine percent of the time, a dream that feels like a warning is surfacing something you already sensed. Our loved ones see our lives in vignettes, and when they highlight something, it’s usually confirming what your own intuition already told you.
The other one percent can be symbolic rather than literal. MaryAnn once dreamed of running from tornadoes with her deceased in-laws, followed by a beautiful, calm sunset. She took it as reassurance that whatever storm she was in at the time would pass, not as a forecast. Months later, a house she was building in Florida was hit by a tornado, and she still held to that same interpretation: her in-laws were showing her the end result, not warning her of the storm. If a message is meant to be literal, MaryAnn says, it will be revealed. You don’t have to go searching for it.
How to Interpret a Visitation Dream (Without Overthinking It)
MaryAnn’s method is refreshingly simple. When you wake up, ask yourself one question: what did this dream mean to me? Don’t strain for it, and let the first thing that comes be enough. Sometimes it’s exactly what it looks like: your loved one showed up to make a connection. That’s the whole message.
If there is symbolism, get curious the way you’d get curious about a puzzle: who, what, where, when, why. Commit to it without overthinking it, and let it be fun rather than a test you’re worried about failing.
Whatever you land on, go with gratitude. Treat every visitation like it worked, because it did. Say thank you, and tell people about it, because that excitement is what invites the next one.
Why You Might Not Be Dreaming About Your Loved One — and What to Do Instead
If everyone around you seems to be getting visitation dreams and you’re not, please hear this: it doesn’t mean anything is wrong with you, and it doesn’t mean your loved one isn’t around.
MaryAnn explained that if you’re in deep grief, or only remembering your loved one through how they died, that frame of reference can make it genuinely hard for them to come through in a way that feels good. Sometimes, she says, they’re protecting you from a dream that would land as heavy while you’re still that raw.
Daydreaming and Automatic Writing as an Alternative
If dream state isn’t opening up yet, MaryAnn recommends trying daydreaming, meditation, or a practice she loves: writing a letter. Address it to your loved one directly, then start writing whatever comes, even if your logical brain insists you’re making it up. That’s automatic writing, and it sharpens the same muscle a dream visitation uses.
I do a version of this myself most nights, journaling before bed and letting my pen flow without editing it. At a certain point the handwriting itself will shift, almost like it’s not entirely mine. That’s usually when I know my grandmother, who I call Grammy, has stepped in.
How to Invite a Loved One to Visit You in a Dream: Request, Receive, Record
MaryAnn teaches a three-part practice for exactly this.
Request. Right before you fall asleep, gather your guides in your mind’s eye: Dear [name], please come to me tonight so that we may have a visitation together. I am open, I am ready, and I am saying yes.
Receive. As you drift off, let yourself actually receive whatever comes, rather than watching for it from a distance. This part is passive on purpose. You’re not chasing the visit, you’re allowing it.
Record. The moment you wake up, write down everything you remember, even the parts that don’t make sense, whether or not your loved one showed up. Then ask: what does this mean to me?
This practice is taken from MaryAnn’s book The Guide(S) Book.
Can a Dream Visitation Help You Forgive or Make Amends?
Yes, MaryAnn told me she’s seen plenty of energies come through in readings asking for forgiveness or admitting old wrongdoing. Whether you want to receive that is entirely up to you, but it can be deeply healing.
Toward the end of my grandmother’s life, I was in one of the lowest points of mine, carrying old family trauma, and I couldn’t bring myself to visit her even though she lived an hour away and kept asking why I wasn’t coming. I carried real guilt about that after she passed. Now I talk to her often in spirit and tell her I’m sorry I couldn’t be there the way she needed. She always answers the same way: I understand. I love you. I’m here with you now.
MaryAnn has never once had a spirit come through angry or asking her to pass along resentment. If you want to work on forgiveness with someone who’s passed, you can do it in a meditative state as easily as in a dream: picture them across from you, speak from your higher self to theirs, and say what you need to say.
Resources
I recommend MaryAnn’s book The Guide(s) Book and companion card deck.
You can learn more about MaryAnn’s work here.
You might also like my book The Universe Has Your Back.
Want to go deeper? Join me for Dear Guides Live on Nov 21 in NYC for a day dedicated to connecting to your angels and spirit guides. Get all the details here.
Get my free meditation to connect with your spirit guides
Frequently Asked Questions
What is a dream visitation from a deceased loved one? A real connection with someone who’s passed, not a memory or your imagination replaying the past. It’s your loved one meeting you in the middle ground between this world and the next, usually to offer comfort.
How do you know if a dream visit from spirit is real? Look for unusual vividness, a loved one who appears healthy and at ease, a strong feeling of actually having been with them, and a tone of comfort or calm rather than the randomness of an ordinary dream.
What does it mean if a deceased loved one’s dream feels like a warning? Almost always, it’s confirming something you already sensed rather than predicting something new. A heavy-feeling dream often says more about your current emotional state than about danger ahead, so choose the most positive interpretation available.
How can you ask a deceased loved one to visit you in a dream? Use MaryAnn DiMarco’s request-receive-record practice before bed: ask them by name to come to you tonight, stay open as you drift off, and write down everything you remember the moment you wake up. You can also try the meditation in this episode.
Why am I not dreaming about my loved one who died? It isn’t a sign anything is wrong. Deep grief can make it harder for them to come through comfortably. Daydreaming and automatic writing are gentler ways to build the same connection.
Can you hear a deceased loved one as well as see them in a dream? Yes, though many people receive messages without words at all. Visitations often communicate telepathically, through feeling and symbols, so pay attention to all of your senses.
About Gabby
Gabrielle Bernstein is a #1 New York Times bestselling author, motivational speaker, and host of the Dear Guides podcast. Her books include Self Help and the forthcoming Unshakable Faith. She has spent more than two decades helping people heal, connect with their intuition, and build a relationship with the spiritual realm.