Reclaim Your Power When You Feel Powerless

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We’ve become accustomed to frightening news, from war and mass violence to terrifying natural disasters and a global pandemic.

Following a tragedy, we’re taught to quickly pick up and get on with our lives, but on a subconscious level we still feel the terror.

It’s easy to hide in a bar, numb out with the internet or turn off the news and pretend like nothing happened. But if you avoid your fear it will subconsciously haunt you. It’s important to move through our emotions and heal them.

How to reclaim your power when you feel powerless

There’s no right or wrong way to handle our feelings, though there are tools that can help. Outlined below are a few steps for working through your fear to reclaim your power when you feel powerless.

Step 1: Get honest about your fear

It’s healthy to admit that you’re afraid. When you honestly acknowledge your fear you release the tension of holding onto it.

Share your fear with a loved one, write about it in a journal, or share your experience with a therapist or a support group.

Openly admitting your feelings is a crucial step toward working through your fear.

If you’re up for it, I encourage you to share your feelings in the comments below. Share your truth and know that your honesty will help another reader. We’re all in this together.

Step 2: Breathe through your feelings

True healing occurs when I give myself permission to feel whatever feelings live below the triggers. | Gabby Bernstein | The Universe Has Your Back card deckThe next step is to identify where you carry your fear in your body. Maybe you can feel it in your throat, your chest or your stomach.

Sit for a moment of stillness and sense where your fear is held in your body.

Then breathe deeply into the space where your fear is held. Continue to breathe into the tension and on the exhale release it.

Continue this cycle of breath until you feel the tension release.

Your breath is the greatest tool for releasing fear in your body.

Step 3: Connect with others

Connecting with others’ positive, peaceful energy is the best way to reclaim your power when you feel powerless. Some ways to do this:

  • Reach out to friends you trust and whose presence makes you feel good
  • Volunteer with a nonprofit organization you love
  • Offer to help your neighbors, for example, baby-sitting someone’s child or picking up groceries for an elderly person
  • Get involved in a positive online community like my Miracle Membership.

When you feel powerless and you’re not sure what to do, ask yourself, “How can I be of service to someone else?” You will quickly feel energized, connected and inspired.

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    1. I’m deeply sorry for your loss, Deb, and I want you to know that I’m holding you with a lot of love and compassion right now.

      To help you process your feelings of grief and loss, I encourage you to reach out to an online grief counselor or support group.

      In the meantime, here are some other resources that you might find helpful:

      The Grief Club by Melody Beattie
      Tears to Triumph by Marianne Williamson

      Important note: Unexpected emotions can arise when you practice EFT. If your loss is very recent, or if you feel overwhelmed by grief, tap with caution or wait until you have recovered more. Talk your therapist or doctor before tapping if you’re new to it or not sure how to handle strong feelings that may come up.
      Brad Yates video for tapping on loss & grief:
      The Tapping Solution (Nick Ortner) 52-minute audio lesson and EFT guidance on processing grief:

      Jack Kornfield guided meditation on grief:
      Chopra Center written guidance on meditating after loss:

      You’re in our thoughts. Sending you much love. xoxo

  1. Hello Gabby. I feel powerless when my thoughts go over and over again the same issue: waiting with hope for a reaction of someone. Than my ego comes up with the voice of fear: the other person is not waiting for you, you are not worth the effort etc etc. And then I go to my inner guide which really helps to sit and “pray”. And I am all excited: Yes I feel joyfull again, I am worthy , i do not wait for the outcome, the other is where he/she is and thats oke….And then 10 minutes later the whole story starts again in my head….and my ego of fear (i am not good enough) controle and insecurity does not let me go and starts again. And then…..I feel really powerless. I had the love for 10 minutes in my hands and than it slipped away…. Thank you for listening and be able to share. Warm greetings Simone

    1. Thank you for your honest share, Simone. The next time you find yourself repeating the cycle, you may want to try implementing the Choose Again method that Gabby discusses here: /choose-again/. xoxo

      1. Thank you for your reply! It is just now that i’am reading your reply. And what’s nice that i wrote in my journal, just seconds before i read your reply ” : about the choose again method and how it is helpfull! I was reading the blog”reframe your fears”. Well now I know certain that this method is a souce of power for me. And to come back to love as soon as possible….X thank you.

  2. When I think about it, It feels horrible. My biggest fear it to loose control, especially during the week-end. When I’m with them; my beloved kids.

    Since I discover Kundalini meditation with Gabby, I discover a total new land. A land of LOVE. Only.

    The problem seems to be that, when I am NOT in this place of love, which it means self-judgment, screaming from my boys, or judgment from myself.

    How do I accept myself, I want to reach acceptance, and how? I feel like I’m living in a jungle. Tangle in my own head and thoughts sometimes. Specially when them around.

    I need acceptance. To get used to accept myself, to understand that my own thoughts are okay. Even if it’s so horrible for a moment, like when you listen to the voice of tiredness…

    God who ever you may are, help me to breathe & act from a place of love. Specially with them, my beloved twins boys, even if their screaming so loud.

    Is it normal that a state of awareness is a a constant work (in progress)?

    1. Yes that is normal! We call it a spiritual practice for a reason – it is a daily practice of surrender, of prayer, of listening, of choosing again. It is not about perfection. I recommend checking out my book Miracles Now for simple, powerful exercises and meditations you can do in the moment to help you pause, breathe and shift your perspective. Also try my meditation to calm down fast.

      Sending you love and light.

    2. I feel Powerless when it comes to sharing my truth and self- expression. I have identified it in me and thanks to my guides and angels who helped in this process of identification.

      I have been implementing counter thoughts and reminding myself to be not hard on me every time I acknowledge the same feelings of powerlessness.

      It’s such a beautiful journey of spiritual growth – Learning about yourself and sharing your experiences and lessons with others.

  3. I have been in a relationship with a man for 11 years who has and continues to struggle with addiction. I am working my own addiction recovery process, but he still struggles. Yesterday I got a call that he had stolen items from a home, including guns. I’m very afraid that he is going to hurt himself or someone else. I’m afraid for his safety and well being and find myself obsessive over where he is, what he is doing, what is going to happen. I’m so frightened.

  4. Hello,
    First of all, Merry Christmas and I hope you have a happy New Year! 🙂 I recently came across an article that was written about you in this month’s Natural Awakenings magazine. I was inspired when I read how you mentioned how you deal with difficult situations/powerlessness, which is to say a prayer while in stillness. I needed to read that, because I am going through a couple of situations that make me afraid. The first is that I am living on the bottom floor in an apartment complex and have been experiencing problems with the upstairs neighbors. When the neighbor’s child comes over to spend the weekend or what have you, the child is very rowdy. It makes me very nervous when she comes over because I can’t do anything to get away from the noise. Despite having talked with the property managers about the issue, it still persists. I know the only other alternative is to move, but I don’t have the money right now. And that is so very frustrating. The other issue has to do with wanting to be in a relationship with an awesome lady. I’ll admit that I am shy and I have trouble with my confidence. I’m 37 right now, yet I’m afraid that I won’t find the right woman. I know the type of woman that I would like to date, but I feel so awkward right now. I would greatly appreciate any advice you could give. Thank you so much. Namaste.

  5. I’m really enjoying the design and layout of your website. It’s a very easy on the eyes which makes it much more pleasant for me to come here and visit more often. Did you hire out a designer to create your theme? Superb work!

  6. My home was broken into and I was robbed last month. Everything was taken. My home office cleaned out, all financial files, sentimental jewelry, bedroom items and underwear. I have been trying very hard to focus gratitude for my safety and health. It’s been a sickening feeling to know some disgusting scumbag was in my my sacred place in my home, my bedroom touching my things. I’ve spent all my energy focused in moving thru, moving forward, ignoring feelings of total violation and lack of security. I don’t feel
    safe. I don’t make eye contact with those in my neighborhood fearing they are smirking as if they were the one that got away. I’d like to learn more about finding a balance to owning what happened/moving on/returning to empowerment.

    1. I have been working on my fears for two years and making a solid sustained effort to unload assumptions of others; I have been afraid all my life but never knew the driving force but now I do. It has been a solitary confinement of my most inner secrets and never feeling like anyone would accept me for who I was because I did not accept me fully. I am now in a consistent daily program of strengthening my inner spirit, and my connection to that most sacred source that empowers me. I too was broken into and that’s a horrible feeling of violation so I owned it, that feeling and felt it deeply and began a mantra of acceptance and forgiveness. May you be blessed to know your divine power.

  7. I am afraid I will not be able to make and keep a girlfriendship. I am afraid of never figuring out how to connect successfully with other women and having a healthy relationship. I am afraid of strangers and what they might think of me. I am afraid of getting hurt or doing something wrong. I am afraid that I am not useful and valuable in this world. I am afraid all this Helpdesk chatter, that it is just talk and will not help me. I am afraid of rejection. I am afraid of being fat, undesirable, unfocused, and a nusance.

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