What to Do When People Start Gossiping

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I’m in the midst of writing a new book called Judgment Detox (preorder now!). Whenever I’m writing a new book, I have the experience of living the practice for two reasons: I want to test-drive every tool and lesson, many of which I’ve used for years and am bringing together in one cohesive method. And second, since I’m writing about it all day, it’s at the forefront of my mind.

As a result of putting myself through the Judgment Detox, I’ve noticed I’ve been very different in the midst of gossip. When I see people talking or judging, or discussing the crazy news stories happening these days, I’m finding myself for the first time in my life being silent. I’m just witnessing and letting people share their opinions without feeling the need to judge them or enforce my own opinion.

This is a miracle. Watch the video below and then read on to learn more.

The Judgment Detox is working on me as I write it. I’m having the experience of being the witness of the judgment that’s around me. Because it’s everywhere. The kindest and most generous people judge because it’s just what we do. It’s what we lean into, what we’ve grown to rely on. Anytime we turn on the news, we’re judging. We judge when we open a magazine or scroll through social media.

We have to be the conscious witness of this judgment. In the midst of other people’s gossip, be silent and witness. Becoming aware of judgment is the first step — it’s just scratching the surface of the lessons in this book. But it will prepare you as this book comes into form.

Start paying attention to the people around you who are judging, gossiping and complaining. And try for a moment to be silent in the midst of that gossip. See the power that comes over you in not saying anything and just being still. Maybe you say a silent prayer for the people who are in judgment, or pray for yourself to let go of the inevitable judgments that come through your mind.

Just create space in your mind where there is no judgment, no agenda — just witness a situation with no agenda whatsoever. This is a practice that happens over time, so begin with being silent. Your silence is powerful, and it is a response.

See what happens when you face gossip with silence and be still in the experience of what other people are saying. I want to hear how this goes for you, so post your comments below! And get ready, because there’s a lot more coming your way with the Judgment Detox.

I can’t wait to share this book with you!

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