Note: Updated in June 2018 for clarity and additional resources.
Do you ever struggle to make a big decision with confidence?
When you have an important choice in front of you, are there places within you that resist that change, even when you really want it?
I see so many people freeze up with fear that they never take those leaps. They put off decisions and stay right where they are.
When we listen to fear, we deny the world our light
When we don’t allow ourselves to make big decisions and move forward on our desires and callings, the consequences are real. Not only do we feel frustrated and unhappy, but we also deny the world our light. We deny the world our great gifts and contributions.
If you can relate to this, you will want the three-step method I share below! These three steps will help you trust the Universe and shift your energy when you’re faced with a big decision.
Keep reading to find out the steps you can take to make a big decision with confidence!
I’ve often resisted big decisions
In my life I’ve had many moments where I was disconnected from a decision, feeling resistance, fear, doubt, uncertainty. I let others tell me I couldn’t do it and I believed in the doubt of the world.
For example, when I first started writing, I didn’t consider myself to be a writer. I had no background in writing and hadn’t taken an English class since high school. Even though I was comfortable speaking publicly, I could barely string a sentence together on the page and I thought I was a terrible speller.
When it came time to sit down and write my first book, I almost didn’t do it. I had so much fear and uncertainty around my ability to write a book that I almost ran away from it.
But as a result of practicing the steps I’m going to give you below, I released my resistance and fear. I made the decision to write that book and made it with confidence.
3 steps to making a big decision with confidence
If you’re at a crossroads in your life where you’re deciding whether to move forward with something, leave something that’s not working for you, or invest in something that’s going to take you to the next level, practice these steps so you can say YES. Don’t miss out on that big decision that could change your life! Make your next big decision with confidence!
Step 1: Look closely at the ways that you’re resisting
This step is simple. There is often fear within us that holds us back from making a big decision. Start to pay close attention to the way you feel when you think about this decision. Are you feeling terrified? Energized? Are you feeling good about it, but the voice of limitation keeps holding you down?
As you become more conscious of your feelings, witness them without judgment so you can begin to understand them. When you honor your feelings, you can recognize that they are creating a story — one that you can choose to let go of.
Step 2: Witness how your feelings are creating a Universal response
Your feelings become your energy, and they inform your own actions as well as other people’s actions toward you.
Here’s an example. I had a great client many years ago who felt called to go to Africa to teach and be in service of others for six months before starting college. She went to her parents and told them she wanted to do this work.
But despite how much she wanted to do this, she was really unsure when she sat down with them. Their immediate response was, “This is crazy! You can’t go to Africa right now! You have to go to college. We can’t believe you’re even considering this.”
She came to me really upset after her conversation and I said to her: “Their resistance is a reflection of your fear and of your OWN resistance.” The Universe reflects back to you what you put out. So together we did spiritual work to heal her own resistance. She began allowing herself to accept that this was a great decision, and she got into the feeling of that great service work she wanted to do.
As a result, she completely changed her energy. In the presence of feeling better she went back to her parents and brought up, again, her desire to go to Africa to do service work. And their walls fell down, too! They agreed that it was a good decision and they trusted her choice. I told her that healing her own resistance was what healed the reflection of her resistance that she found in them.
Compassionately witness and honor your feelings
When you witness and honor your own feelings of resistance and fear, you can see where they may be creating a story of lack and limitation within you — and informing how others feel about your decision, too.
You can heal that resistance by getting into the feeling of what it is you truly want, and by doing spiritual work such as praying, meditating, reciting mantras or reading a book like The Universe Has Your Back.
You can also use a card deck as a springboard to understanding and healing your fear and resistance when you’re not sure where or how to start.
Step 3: Cultivate an “Eff it, let’s go” mentality
This is the final step in getting unstuck from that in-between place in the decision-making process, saying YES, and taking that action!
I share about this a lot because I love it! This is a mentality of “I’m going to do this!” Often when we’re stuck and can’t make a decision, the best thing to do is just GO. As the great Kundalini teacher Yogi Bhajan said, “When the time is on you, start, and the pressure will be off.”
Take that first action and feel the momentum
When the voice of doubt and limitation is holding you back, I challenge you to just go. Take that first action. Make that decision. Make that commitment to move forward in your life. When you realize that it’s just the voice of fear holding you back, the act of moving gets you out of that space of fear. It creates more FUN energy that propels you forward!
“Eff it, let’s go” diminishes that resistance. It allows you to take action and make a move with confidence. Just do something and the pressure will lift!
Remember: When you don’t make a decision and don’t move forward, you are doing a disservice to the world. So I hope you take in these steps, honor them and follow them. Take the next right action in your life! Use these steps to make a big decision with confidence.
Inspire others by doing what inspires YOU!
If you’re ready to take action and make an impact doing what you love, enroll in the Spirit Junkie Masterclass Digital Course!
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