How to stop complaining

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Most of the time when we complain a lot, we’re avoiding what we really need to feel. When we find ourselves griping about something outside of us, it’s a good sign that we haven’t addressed something inside. Watch this vlog to learn more.






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  1. Just found out about you via twitter. I have leaning towards meditation and spiritual living more recently. Perhaps finding you was a sign to start! Also, love your video on complaining because I needed some insight.

  2. Namaste Gabby,

    I am from India and saw your video on youtube on marietv.
    Nice to see on spiritual path and guiding those who are loosing the track.. good work.

    1 Question: R u married ?

  3. Sat Nam Gabby!
    Thanks for this. You’ve popped into my life in the most synchronic ways. My partner Ravidass & I just started a 21 day no complaining exercise. Thanks for sharing the love of ACIM & Kundalini Yoga. Sending love, support, & gratitude for sharing your light and truth! Lisa (aka Akalmeet)

  4. Hi Gabby,
    This is great… I’ve been working on this, and your video is so helpful. It’s not really enough just to refrain from saying the complaints you’re thinking about, and I am excited to start delving into the deeper feelings that reside in my body & heart.
    Can you speak to how to deal with complainers? I am often on the other side of the coin (one of my archetypes is Caretaker) and I am always unsure how to proceed with people who, like me sometimes, get stuck in the “victim” mentality.
    Thanks again, I love watching your vlogs. <3

  5. Thank You. So much. This came at just the right time. I will be checking out your books, site, etc… This was the first thing I found from you and I can’t wait to start!

  6. Good Advice. I also did this recently. Simple things like playing the victim, blaming other people and I just said “I have to take responsibility for my actions”.. I did that and felt lighter and more in control.. Thanks!!

  7. Thank you.

    I was recently told by guy close to me ‘don’t complain’–So, when I had this bad day today, I just avoided him (which might have upset him, too?) because I felt bad, and didn’t want to ‘complain’ to him, so tried to stay away. Thanks for giving an actual way that might get rid of it/solve something, instead of just complaining alone… 🙂 will try

  8. Thank you Gabby for your wonderful advice. Complaining can be such a trap that we get ourselves and everyone around us stuck in. It can be so contagious. Thank you for the tools to remove ourselves from that space and begin to see the light again!
    Much love,

  9. Dear Gabby, I have been complaining ALLOT about my neighbor who is running his construction business and “Stump Grinding” out of his yard! The noise is awful and it has been going on all summer, late into the night. It is really hot too we have to keep all the doors and windows open to help stay cool at night. When I finally asked him to cut it to a civilized hour he told me to F. OFF. So, I complained to the City. I am not a confrontational person as a bodyworker and meditator, but my serenity is being compromised by the tractor outside my window at 10: 00 PM. I think I have some validity here and what would Gabby do? Frazzled In South Lake Tahoe 🙁 Karen

  10. Oh my goodness, this came at a right time, I soo needed this. I too complain without knowing I am until someone calls me on it or other times I catch myself hearing my inutition saying to me “you’re complaining’. It really doesn’t feel great in my body or mood feeling drained. Thank you so much for this video it benefited me to use the tools. Keep doing what you do shining your light to the world!

  11. Thank you so much Gabby! Great way to start the week…. I would like to know if this vlog can be applied to parenting a teen?? it seems that only complaining about the things not getting, its when the results happen….am I mixing things up?

  12. Can anyone recommend any good books on ‘free writing’; I really want to learn more about this so I can try it out! Ta muchly x

      1. Great, thank you Gabby! That’s one of the books I’ve ordered so I must have been looking out for myself already 🙂 x

  13. I complain constantly! It’s the way I was brought up. This is all I know! This was the only way of communication. Now I’m at a total standstill I can’t find happiness in anything….how do you handle chronic complaining? I’m also finding that I’m attracting people who complain around me! Help

  14. Gabby, thanks for this. It’s coming at a great time for me. Also, thanks to you I’ve adopted Emotional Freedom Technique, or EFT, into my life and it has been life altering. I’m using EFT when I notice that my mind is going to a negative, whiny place.

  15. Thank you for letting your light shine so bright! I am smack in the middle of reading May Cause Miracles and am so thankful for finding it…TRANSFORMATIONAL! Thank you for living your truth and paying it forward on such a daily basis!! 🙂

  16. Love this! I do a similar thing when I start worrying – sit with it and then it begins to dissolve or sometimes I even come up with solutions. Love your stuff Gabby, I’m reading May Cause Miracles and its been such an inspiration! Keep shining your beautiful light


  17. Love this Gabby, thank you. Sometimes if my boyfriend and I find ourselves complaining about something we stop whatever we are doing, physically take a few steps back to where we were before the complaint was verbalised (or thought) and then we proceed again with different thoughts and chat. It always works, and particularly well if we feel we’re bickering about something pointless! xx

  18. Wow! I needed this. I’ve had a very hard couple months with complaining.I”m usually the most positive person but have seen a change in myself. Thank you so much for your talk… Hugs

  19. Thank you for this! Your message is always exactly what I need at exactly the right time. See you tonight at Finally Full.

    Jessica (From Sun Valley!)

  20. I love this topic Gabby.
    Complaining is such a waste of energy; energy & attention that could be put elsewhere to enhance our mood and uplift others!

    The biggest thing I notice is that when I complain I most likely am tired. When I stop and pay attention to my body and how I feel (if I’m tired or stress) then I can choose to take a nap, do a short pranayama or yoga nidra et voilà, no more complaining 🙂

  21. Love this!! I started feeling funky this morning on the bus and when I allowed myself to feel the feelings instead of looking to outside sources to make me “feel better” (i.e. smoking, complaining, drinking coffee), I noticed a shift that seriously felt miraculous. I would love to play this for some co-workers I have…although since I watched this I now have more compassion for them. Awesome video. xo

  22. LOOOOVE It!! Thank you for being so inspiring 🙂
    By the way, just finished your book “Spririt Junkie”, OMG! I am glad I found you 🙂
    Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart. Can’t wait to read the other ones.

  23. As always, the universe is looking out for me. I was just in the middle of complaining to my boyfriend about having to go back to work tomorrow after an extended vacation and this vlog popped into my inbox. I was able to stop myself mid-complaint and reframe my thoughts to total gratitude for the awesome vacation I had!

    Thanks for all you do to keep us focused on love and gratitude, Gabby!

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