You Can Have It All. Here’s How.

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I once had the privilege of attending a women’s conference hosted by Arianna Huffington. I was surrounded by some of the most successful women in our country. Each panel discussion included women CEO’s, prominent news anchors, film directors, reporters and more. All of whom were also mothers. Each woman openly discussed how hard it is to balance a successful career and a home life. They were all managing to keep everything together but much like any person who has a busy life, it seemed stressful.

Though there was an honest mention of stress there was a lot of empowering guidance coming from each panelist. The one message that continued to come up throughout the entire event was the concept that you can indeed have it all, but not all at the same time. This concept resonated with me deeply. I have always wondered how one can possibly manage it “all.” This was the answer! This message gave me hope. It helped me realize that I could focus my attention at different times in my life on what was important to me then. Rather than try to be everything all at once.

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If you are someone who gets overwhelmed by the idea that you need to “have it all” then this principle is for you. Whenever you find the voice of your inner achievement addict, give yourself permission to thrive at one or two things and let go of the rest, for now. This principle is not suggesting that you give up your dreams or put your passions to the side. In fact, it’s saying the opposite. This suggestion gives you the opportunity to excel in many areas of your life and maintain the momentum. When we allow ourselves to focus on what’s right in front of us then we can manage and sustain the flow of our life. Whereas if we’re trying to do “it all” at once we will inevitably burn out. In this video I share more guidance on the topic.

Some of you may not resonate with this concept at first. In fact, I got some push back from this principle when I posted it on my Facebook page. Some people stated that they believed that the Universe was abundant and that they deserved to have it all, and NOW! Though I agree that the Universe is abundant and conspiring to serve us at all times there is a lot to be said for timing.

I believe that the Universe is always working on our behalf but not always working on our time. Tweet it!

It’s important that we, as people on a spiritual path, accept that the Universe has a plan far greater than we do. So if we’re guided to focus on different strengths at different times then we must go with the flow rather than swim against the stream. When we flow towards what is working, rather than push into what isn’t then we allow the Universe to lead us towards what serves our highest good.

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75 COMMENTS

  1. Thank you for posting this! Am just learning how to find my voice & passion after 49 yrs. Really love your jewelry especially the Turquoise (?) bracelet! Can you share with us where you get your gems from?
    Happy Spring & Easter! Take care everyone 😉

    1. ahhh i wish i knew. this shoot was done with CNE and they had a lovely stylist who dressed me:) typically I don’t wear that much jewelry. it was fun…

  2. 🙂 What a great reminder! Thank you Gaby! <3 <3

    Speeding up by slowing down really does work for me!!
    I'll be finished with university this summer but before that I have to hand in a lot of papers and write some important tests. So I made "Speeding up by slowing" my mantra for this time!! I now take yoga classes twice a week (instead of only once), meditate more (especially when these nasty fearful thoughts come up…) and go for walks in nature on a daily basis.
    The crazy thing is that I actually am in a very "hectic" period of my life but inside I am totally calm and relaxed 🙂

    I wish everyone a great and sunny week!

    Much love,
    Alex

    Ps. Currently I am reading "Spirit Junkie" during my breaks – LOVE IT!!

    1. Wow! Alex, I am doing exactly what you are doing. I go to Bikram Yoga twice a week and make sure I walk. I always feel like I can’t catch up and complete my checklist, but somehow with ease and relaxation I manage to get a lot done. Thank you, Gabby for this incredible confirmation! Time for a cup of ginger tea now. 🙂

      1. So true!! I made the experience that as soon as I am in a relaxed state of mind I can see things more clearly and I am much more focused. This allows me to set priorities for the day.
        Oooh, a cup of tea is actually a fantastic idea! 😉
        I wish you a happy and relaxed day!
        Much love,A.

  3. Yes! I have found that most of not all of the stress that I feel is pressure I put on myself. I may think it’s the world or my family or whatever at the time, but it’s really all coming from myself and my own expectations. Thank you for saying we can have it all but not at the same time. I think everyone who watched this just took a big sigh of relief haha have a great week Gabby! Xo

  4. “Speeding up by slowing down” brings to mind one of my favorite expressions I learned while living in the south…”The hurrier I go, the behinder I get.” The faster you try to go the more mistakes you have to double back and correct, thus taking twice as long for the task. Great advice as always, Gabby! <3

  5. Hi, Gabby!~ Wonderful words to live by! Since being laid off from my job last year, I voluntarily decided to stay home and be more with my husband and 9 year old daughter. Now I find myself involved with volunteering pursuits at her school and a leadership position at church- I think I am busier now than when I was at work! I’m a Libra, so balance and burnout are the issues I am embracing now. I understand the concept of paradigm shifts and seeking more care for myself, but i still backpedal and want to lead others and take on too much at times. Do you have some insight to guide me down the middle of my road?

  6. This post really hit home for me. There are so many things in my life I want to work on,but I really feel the need at this point to focus on my health as my priority. It made me feel somewhat guilty to put everything(and everyone) else in second or third place. I needed to hear this, and now I feel much calmer and even more positive about all the self care I have been working on lately. Thank you !

  7. This just made my day! One step at a time! Thank you thank you thank you! I really needed to hear this. Started a business, doing so much (and it is going well which is amazing), and to try and be calm in the middle while also getting married in September and really craving my dream body has made me rather ill for 3 weeks.

    Going to do some yoga and a meditation right now!
    Thanks again Gaby!
    xx
    Audrey

  8. Gabby,
    I just wanted to let you know what an inspiration you have been to me. I divorced 7 years ago and this year have decided to start a business alone and with a very limited bank account and no funding bc of the divorce. It’s been a very erotically draining process and putting on your podcasts while on the treadmill has inspired the inspiration I need to keep going. I recommend your podcasts to everyone I know looking to reset themselves. Thank you for doing what you do…
    Kind Regards,
    Michelle Niles

  9. Hey Gabby, I wanted to share something awesome with you. I am doing May Cause Miracles practice and I am at the Week 6. It has pulled so many emotions and fears out of me! I was so surprised how much space for improvement we all have. I have moved to the US in January and I really needed consistent spiritual practice to sustain my stability. And the crisis occurred at Week 5. Maybe the course made it come faster (which I am grateful for). However, I got very lazy at my work, slowed down and observed. I slept and journaled a lot. The Week 5 (money and abundance) was especially tricky for me. And yesterday night, Kate Northrup showed up in my dream, telling me that all women have miracles in them, waiting to be expressed! I woke up with a huge smile on my face! my ~ing just spoke to me in an awesome way! Pretty awesome, ha? I feel wonderful! Thank you for being you Gabby!

  10. Love this! I’ve been focusing so much on being a new-ish mama for the last 18 months but feel the pull to switch gears and focus on a career now. How many priorities do you think you can focus on to have it all at once Gabby?

  11. I want to live on the couch. I love you, thanks for showing me we can have it all! woot! brb… off to have fun! …gotta have a successfully day…

  12. Exactly what I needed to hear today. My dad passed away a few weeks ago and it’s really forced me to slow down in so many ways. It’s really uncomfortable and it’s showing me that everything will get done on it’s own time. Moving slowly feels so much more productive than being frozen in fear or in a scurried panic. And I realize that I don’t have to figure out my life – I’m choosing to trust there is a bigger plan even if I don’t know what that is.

    1. ahh sister i’m so sorry to hear this. yes. go slow and honor your path. the slower you go and the more still you become the easier it will be to hear his guidance xoox

  13. This was perfect timing, thank you. Your email regarding this article gave me goosebumps when I saw it, as it was something I needed to hear. I appreciate all you do for us women!

  14. Merci merci Gabby,
    Yes I just realize how I idealize people and you because of their so successful audience and impact, feeling so small with my astrology readings…but I was not seeing that I am in a deep journey of healing and also devoted to my 4 child daughter and spend afternoon playing with her and not creating content for my work!!!
    Thanks a lot, so much gratitude for you!!!
    Caroline

  15. Hi Gabby,

    Love this video 🙂

    Will use this tips when I start my life coach training in April.
    Have found my universe sign – it’s the 11’s as I was born in the 11th hour on 1th November and I see them daily!
    Sat nam, Catherine x

  16. Love this, and it couldn’t have come at a better time.
    I was feeling like I was finally at that point in life where everything was falling together – except for one integral piece; I was missing out on a very significant connection. By going through a separation with my husband, I’m essentially walking away from all of these other ‘wins’ in life: a home I love in a location that means the world, daily interaction with my 2 daughters (as we’ll be sharing custody), time-freedom & flexibility, financial security, more regular travel, a great deal of security…. I’m giving all of that up for the freedom of my HEART. I need a certain, authentic, electric connection in order to want to be in this type of commitment with someone. Yes, my happiness stems from within, but I do have a desire to truly share in that with someone on a deep level. That is what has been missing for me all this time, and it has continued to bubble up for me at regular intervals. In no longer denying myself this desire, I’m recognizing that (although scary too) I’m opening up to a world of opportunity and removing blocks to allow for that bliss to make itself known. I found the ideal part-time flexible work to get me through this transition, as well as the ideal apartment for now. I know those things are ‘temporary’ (even if they are long-term-temporary) – until I can co-conspire with Uni in DIVINE time, to make the rest a reality as well. Just a matter of time. THANK you again for this reminder today – about having it all. I still can. I still will! 🙂 If I could manifest so many amazing things when my heart was still lacking something from within, imagine how amazing it will be when my heart is fully in it! This is a re-birth.

  17. My favourite is the “Measure your success by how much fun you are having”. <3 There's been so many times when I was trying to achieve something and well, sometimes it would work out, sometimes it wouldn't but even if I "succeed" it didn't bring me joy.

    And then when I've started growing spirtually, I finally experienced that INTENTION is everything. It was so simple – I used to do things not for myself or because I wanted them, but to please others or to seem like somebody else, not the real me.

    And then I started following things with right intention – to do the best I CAN, to grow, to learn new things but at the same time have fun with it. <3

    Thank you so much for this reminder, Gabby – sometimes it's easy to lose the right intention, but we can always find this out just by looking at our life. If everything goes right, then we are going in the right direction, and if things are falling apart maybe it's sign that our ego has taken too much control of our lives.

    xoxo

  18. Hey Gabby,
    I soooo needed this reminde!!!! THANK U!
    I’ve just been recovering from an operation and have started to find my feet again. Sometimes those hectic thoughts come in telling me I need to be doing this, I should have done that, I’m not good enough and need to do this to make it better.

    Your advice have set me free once again!! (It always does!!) 🙂
    I am so happy as my focus is on my self care, self love and being shown the way!! I must be super sucssessful because I’m having so much fun!!!! Thank you Gabby!! You look amazing by the way. 😉 xx

  19. In all due respect, I was a bit distracted by he music in the background. I like that you are taking your videos to the next level but this felt over produced.

  20. That is soooo good!! Instantly made me feel better. Amazing stuff. And a good reminder that I need to have more fun!

  21. Hey Gabby, I really feel like we’re sisters. Thank You for sharing love and light witwith us. It is so pleasant to learn from watching u. Thanks again.

  22. I’ve had lists and lists…and more lists! I used to feel guilty if I didn’t accomplish everything on the list each day, but that only made me angry, resentful and frustrated. I wasn’t having fun. Not even a little bit.

    Then I decided to slow down…do what I can in a day, but also taking some time to do what I enjoy. At first, I felt guilty. I then realized that one of the reasons why I pushed myself so hard was because I couldn’t handle those ‘quiet’ moments, those moments when I didn’t have a million thoughts taking over my head. I had to really listen to myself and make realizations that maybe I wasn’t ready to make. However, having said that, I slowly began to see myself relax and suddenly, things started to just happen on their own without having to force them. It was actually kind of a relief.

    Great Vlog as usual, Gabrielle. You’re amazing!

    1. I could not have said it better myself. I feel lighter and actually looking forward to, rather than dreading my day!

  23. Hi Gabby!
    Love you so much and all that you do! This really hit home for me today, I love that saying that you can’t have it all at once, I have heard Oprah say that before too! I have sort of an off topic question, I recently started working with a health coach and I have not told my (live in) boyfriend. I dont really know why, but I have this nervous energy when I think about telling hiim, because I am worried he will not understand. Do you have any suggestions about how to bring this up with him, and tips on how to be ok with his reaction if it is not what I would like it to be? I just think he might not understand why I “need a coach” and I really want to bring this up in the most authentic way possible but even thinking about it tenses all my shoulder and neck muscles! Love and light always – thank you for all that you do!

  24. I have literally been doing this and didn’t realize it! I, of course was beating myself up over not accomplishing other things…..yet, I was slowly realizing that if I didn’t take care of what was most pressing…..the others wouldn’t fall into place.
    Thank you Gabby for beautifully putting into words what I have been feeling. I love the universe and life synchronicities!!
    Love and light to you Gabby!

  25. Gabby, this really spoke to me. Last night i was crying and feeling like giving up because whilst i knew i was getting some things right – i’ve been getting frustrated that by trying to do EVERYTHING i was feeling like i was achieving NOTHING. But now now? I’m going to concentrate on a few key things i know i need to get right for now. Thank you. You’re the best!!! Suzie x

  26. Thanks Gabby!! I am always putting pressure on myself to do more and be more, in my career, my friendships, my family and my fitness. I recently found out I am pregnant with my first baby. My quest to ‘have it all’ has now slowed, all the things I had been chasing to becone better has now fallen to the side, I am going to be a mum and that is my priority now. We see so many women who ‘have it all’ and they do claim you can have the career, be super fit, have a zillion dollars and be a mum. For me, these things don’t make the cut (now)…maybe later on but for now the u universe has blessed me with a littlelife and I am loving being grateful for that every minute of every day ??
    Thank you for reminding me that it is okay ????

  27. What a great post. That question has been on my mind for so long. I love your tips. They are achievable and easy enough to do. Its a good reminder for all of us, thank you! I know I will be sharing this with my friends.

    love and light,
    Grace

  28. Thank you Gabby! This is just what I needed to hear. I love measuring success based on how much fun we are having. This will become my new measure!!!! Thank you!

  29. Lurrrrvvvvv it Gabby, You bring light to my day and shine like a beacon for my spiritual journey xoxox
    PS I will be styling you one day I can feel it!! Hope that didn’t read as creepy as it looks haha!! Big love <3

  30. Measure your Success by how much Fun you’re having?! WOW, I’m going to take that & RUN with it. Thank You So Very Much! Love the New format. AND You Look Especially Beautiful Today!

  31. I think we put so much pressure on ourselves as women and trying to have it all. It’s true …it’s exhausting! Learning to just go with the flow more and let things happen in divine right time. I’m learning that taking time for fun not only improves your life but also your work. Thank you Gabby I love reading all your posts 🙂 p.s. is that your living room or a set ?? love it. love & light to you Steph

  32. Dear Gabby – You just saved me!! I asked the universe for help and there was your video in my email.
    Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
    Tara

  33. Thank you for your wisdom. I couldn’t agree more with everything that you said.

    After having a burnout a year ago I needed to stop wanting to have it all at the same time. For a year my main concern was to get better mentally and physically both for myself and my family. Now I meditate every day and take more time to do things. My new mantra is from Nicole Bordeleau, a yoga and meditation teacher in Quebec, and it says “Le temps ne respecte pas ce qui se fait sans lui” which means : “Time does not respect what happens without it”. So powerful…

    And Gabby I have to thank you again, because last summer I went to your retreat at Omega and after three days of yoga and meditation I was in a real blissful state. It was a shift from hell to the beginning of my recovery. A year later I am joyful and have a real sense of my purpose. Thank you!

    xoxo
    Olivia

  34. Hi Gabby, I am so happy to hear about this. Last year I got to a turning point in my life where I realized that I was completely numbed – I was doing all I could to get it right for everyone except for myself. Slowing down has been so important since. Also, to do only certain things at a certain time. To enjoy doing them. To make changes in the right dosis. A little change at the right time for it. Since then transforming my life step by step towards the light. Thank you for sharing this message, I hope it will shorten the way for many and even prevent them to crash like I did while I was still detouring. I hope it will come at the right time.

  35. Loved the video Gabby! And good tips!
    I do have a question about the “focusing on one thing”…. I use the “circle of life” coaching tool a lot for my own personal use and according to it, you have a better life by balancing all aspects of your life… But if i focus on one specific thing (my career for example) wont i feel out of balance by sort of not taking care of other aspects? How can I actually make it work?

  36. Gabby such a great post! But please help me- i really want romance/love in my life and i am currently trying to heal from a few years of illness and burnout. i am always thinking about my future love of my life, the love i want to have once i am better and fully healed, as i dont think i would be ready for that right now while i am focussing on my health. I do know that my healing/find true love may take a while to come- so i want some romance/connection in the present too as it has been so long! How do i manifest this for the present when my mind is always jumping forward to the better times i want in the future?

  37. Measuring success by how much fun I’m having is the best thing I’ve heard in so long! I have focused on my daughters fun, & forgot that I was allowed to have fun as well! Thank you for a renewed outlook!

  38. Love love love this principle! I started meditation and inner work last year at first it was fun but then became overwhelmed by all the possibilities and the “to do’s”. Had an “ah ha” moment just now. Thx Gabby!

  39. Hi Gabby! I can very much relate to getting caught up in the speed of things. My greatest difficulty right now is that I have very limited time in the evenings to get food ready (and I often try to cook in large batches), have dinner, prep lunch for the next day and then get ready for bed. I only have about 2.5h and often run overtime and end up with 5h of sleep or less. My adrenals are screaming. I feel like if I don’t rush and run to get these things done, then I’m cutting into my sleep. And even way before I get home, I have to run to catch the only bus that can take me home. I feel like I have no way out of this rush and it’s taking a toll on my health. 🙁

  40. Hi Gabby! I love this! I wholeheartedly believe that the Universe is abundant and conspiring to serve us at all times and that we can totally have it all, it just doesn’t happen all at once. Quick question for you though.. what if you’re not sure what/which area to focus on? I ask the Universe for clarity and guidance but I’m still super confused as to which direction to go in (this is a career related q!). Please help! And thank you for being so amazing and inspiring! XOOOOO!!

  41. I love that quote too. Everyone is crediting Ariana but I understand it possibly originated in Australia – Quentin Bryce who was a politician (25th Governor General of Australia). But it’s also been published as an original quote by Molly McKaughan in 1987, Candace Henneken, Oprah Winfrey, Madeline Albright…even Eleanor Roosevelt. Great minds think alike, but I wonder who really coined that gem? It’s brilliant.

  42. Hi Gabby,

    I feel focused on my goals and get a lot of satisfaction from working hard towards them. Though sometimes I feel like I’m too focused. I know this sounds like a silly question but do you have any tips to having more fun?

    Thanks for all you do.
    Ally

  43. Hi Gabby, always love your words, your presence, your message! And I love the new look of everything ! Very cool :0) This statement is so natural to me “have it all, but not all at once”. The minute I think I have to have it all at once, I”m miserable. But when I look at my life, all of its chapters and facets, I’m amazed, truly amazed at all that I’ve lived and am living. As a single mom with three, I can’t possibly have it all at once…I”m lucky if I have the dishes clean! Yet I have my own business growing, I have relationships I adore, every few months different dreams come into the fore of my life and are explored…sometimes it’s wonderful to set some aside so I can enjoy others! At any rate, your messages, your books, and your God is My Publicist course that I’ve listened to a thousand times, have all had profound impact on the life I live today. It’s hard to describe, but THANK YOU! And…FUN is where the magic is. that’s why it feels good…it’s where we want to be :0)

  44. Loved this so much, Gabby! I’ve noticed that as I slow down a bit and let my attention rest on the things I’m happy about in my life, there is so much more ease. The funny thing is that as soon as I notice the ease, my mind tries to elbow in and say, “But look at all the stuff you haven’t done yet…you’re supposed to be working harder!” So, for me I look for that sweet spot between action and allowing. It’s so amazing how when I’m right in that spot I don’t need to work harder, I connect more easily with clients I can help, people I wanted to reach call me back without me following up endlessly (and feeling super pushy), and things just come together. It’s so nice. Thank you for all of your great insights!

  45. Great content.
    Measure your success not by what you’ve got done today (OMG, that’s what I do!), but by the fun you had today. Wow, funny how I immediately get scared thinking of that (thoughts like: ‘nooo, that would be completely irresponsible! what about my work?’)

    You’re really spreading light into the world with your videos, thank you so much. I just wanted to share that your own videos look so much ‘closer’ to you than the Glamour videos (more authentic). In the Glamour ones you’re wearing more make-up, your clothes and the environment have ‘loud’ colours and many details, there is music on the background.. so many stimulants, like you’re shouting at us.
    I understand you might reach a new public this way; I just wanted to share that the styling of these videos doesn’t do you justice.

    keep up the good works!
    lots of love,
    Margje

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