How to Handle What’s Out of Your Control

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In this vlog I offer practical tools and spiritual solutions for how to handle situations that are out of your control. Enjoy the vlog!

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69 COMMENTS

  1. I definitely needed this lesson (a reminder really) this week!

    As I apply to jobs and go through the interview process (which causes a lot of anxiety for me) I will focus on being present rather than controlling. After all, I want my authentic self to shine and keep my ego in check (I don’t want the latter to get hired- that’s not good for anyone!)

    “If not this, something better!” is what I will tell myself as I leave interviews.

    Thanks Gabby and the Spirit Junkie community!

  2. Thank you Gabby for all your vlogs! This is something to practice every day. Praying for the highest good in itself is a blessing we can practice at any time. I need to keep this on my radar at all times?

  3. This was such a timely vlog. I’ve been sort of thrown into a situation lately, and all the tools I’ve been trying to learn seem to be being tested at once 🙂
    I think we kind of assign ourselves roles (or I do) and mine is always the person who can fix a situation – or tries to. And I do a million things I think will help, and they don’t always! This past week has taught me that sometimes I can’t solve everything – I need to listen and let it be. And I’ve been trying to remember the best thing I can do is just be loving and patient – because this is out of my control.
    So, hearing this reminded me that it’s okay to be powerless, accept it and believe it will work out.
    And really – what a weight off my shoulders.

  4. Great topic Gabby!

    Every time I stop trying to control situations and I surrender, things always happen in a way that I couldn’t have dreamed of AND usually in a way that is bigger and far beyond what I envisioned for myself.

    This reminded me of one of Oprah’s favorite quotes: “God can dream a bigger dream for you than you could ever dream for yourself.”

  5. thank you so much for this video. This helped clearing my mind. I`m in a relationship with an alcoholic. And I love him when he is sober and everything he is at that moments but he drinks very often and for the past months I have been really sad and has tried to figure out how to fix all this.. Should I stay and believe that he might get better or should I leave him. I do not know. My mind says that I sjould let him go but still I love him when he is sober… So it is very hard..

  6. After a very rough night and morning of feeling trapped by my powerlessness, this was just perfect to hear. Thank you.

  7. Wow! Thank you Gabby!
    That was exactly what i needed today!

    I so much try to keep control of everything that I cannot see all the interferences I’m putting all through my life. Thank you for making me recognize this xx

    Oh, and by the way, do you have plans to visit Montreal anytime soon?

  8. This one really resonated with me, Gabby! I have been struggling to be present and let go of the things I cannot control in these last few months. I think in this last week I have started to regain a sense of calm and flow about my life, and as such, I am now able to release more and more of the uncontrollable circumstances in my life. It is so good to hear some of this stuff out loud, though, so I thank you for that. Looking forward to next week’s vlog!

  9. i totally needed this today…my job is up in the air due to budget cuts…totally out of control no matter what I do…thanks for this. you gave me some great language to use.

  10. You are the Angel in my life, Gabby. Just what I needed today 🙂 and reminded me every time I truly let go and surrender a situation, the outcome is far greater than I even imagined!

    See you at April 27th lecture and May Group.

    Love,
    Greene
    xoxo

  11. So amazing! This has been coming up for me all weekend, reminding me that there is nothing to grasp for because the Universe is always working with me to bring me to what is of the highest good. All it takes is for me to release, get out of my own way and chill.
    Love ya!

  12. Wonderful video Gabby especially after a the weekend of my mother having a mini stroke or tra on Easter morning. I knew the situation was beyond my control but really stepped up to be at my moms side since she was about an hour & half away at hospital by the family shore house. And it turns out I was the only family member who could stay down and be there to bring her home tonight. 🙂 I had my moments of crying, frutrastion with lack of help from the rest of my family and doubt of course but still ultimately I
    wanted to be at her side through this. I’m so grateful my boyfriend came down to be at my side to help. With the help of reading your books and doing hot yoga Easter morning, I really think it helped ground me and go into the role I needed to better help my mom. 🙂

  13. Wow! Thank you for this Vlog…I needed to hear this. I need to surrender to the higher good and allow this process to unfold. I have been waking every night at 3 in the morning after problem solving for hours in my dreams with one thought…control no more!
    Thanks again for the knowledge and timely message!
    Sandra

  14. Gabrielle,thank you sister for the wonderful message,I remember one month ago,I went to my first job interview here in Norway and I released all my doubts,fears related with my language,and I trusted that even if the job will not be given for me,it will be given to somebody else who needed most,and it will be taken care of me as well,But I got the job,my first job,Good:)
    Have a trustworthy day ladies:)

  15. I am going to watch this one everyday this week. THANK YOU, Gaby. I really felt your love today, and I am comforted that we are learning the same lessons. We are the teachers, we are the students, and what a gift you give us – to teach and share your message through your own learning and moment-to-moment experiences. I pray for the highest good and surrender right now. 🙂 Love backatcha!

  16. Hi Gabby!

    I’m knew to Spirit Junkie but i just signed up for your April workshop and really enjoy the vlogs! I am in the middle of having to choose between side jobs and am not sure what to do (it’s not even my main career path and it’s giving me anxiety!) I’m just going to trust the higher good will come of this! Thank you! <3

    -Emma

  17. I recognized your message as one that I can greatly benefit from however I feel great conflict while trying to digest it. Where is the line between ‘doing everything you can’ and ‘getting in your own way’?

  18. Just what I needed today…I’m definitely learning how to go with the flow more and just trust the natural process of things.
    Thank you Gabrielle!

  19. As usual, your teachings come to me at that perfect moment in time. Your vlog this week pounds back to my soul what my therapist and I have been working on regarding my son. I AM powerless to change what is happening, so rather than drive him away by driving him nuts, I give in to the process and know that all will work out as it has in my past.
    Gabby, you are truly an angel and a blessing. Thank you!

  20. Gabby,
    I’ve been trying hard to get in touch with you, but seriously this was what I needed to hear right now. Thank you. X

  21. hi gabby, the other night i had a dream and saw a beautiful white sparkling unicorn and have done some research on them and have come to find out that they co inside with your work! and like your vlog what is out of your control just let be and see what comes about….it seems that they are listening and wanted to know your views on this…great book called wonder of unicorns.. thanks always for your amazing work

  22. This is my favorite vlog yet, thank you! Exactly what I need to hear during my job search, I’ve been replaying it every day this week. <3

  23. We try to control and micro-manage, not because we feel powerful, but because we feel powerless. We fear our ability to cope if things “fall apart”. The art of “allowing” is not passive; it an active expression of our true empowerment, embracing trust in ourselves and spirit. You are not powerless. Much love!

  24. The one thing I always get confused about is setting goals for yourself and knowing what you want and trying to achieve them and putting that in motion, you have to control some stuff??

    How does that apply with not contolling things?

  25. Exactly what I needed to hear this morning, this vlog really spoke to me on such a high level. I finished spirit junkie and have been reading Louise L Hays hows to heal your life (I saw your photo with her, shes amazing just like you!!). I love her quote “The universe will give me exactly what I desire, if it doesn’t it will give me something much better”
    Its so exciting watching our higher powers plan unfold before our eyes, even if it doesn’t always feel that way. Trust, have faith, forgive and love!!! 🙂

  26. When you posted this last week I was stuck deep in a nasty funk. I’ve been feeling generally discontent living in LA for some time, and the development of a few terrible situations just pushed me right over the edge. My best friend was hospitalized in San Diego for life threatening emergency surgery, my car was stolen from my apartment complex, and I was berated at work (again) by an obnoxious superior. I was feeling completely disconnected from source and truly helpless. This video was such a blessing! I needed to surrender the outcome to the universe & stop stressing out trying to find a solution. Every time I found myself worrying, I would just take a breath & pray for the highest good. Just like magic, everything started falling into place. My car was found & I met a lawyer who advised me on how to get out of my lease because of the recent crime spree. My friend was able to go home from the hospital, where she ran into her neighbor who happens to work for the same company I do. Now the neighbor is going to help me transfer my job back to San Diego, where I can help my friend recover & get away from my rotten boss. For bonus points, an old flame just showed up out of the blue wanting to give it another shot. Let me tell you, I believe in miracles! Thank you for the amazing lesson. You are an angel!

  27. Gabby , you are a gift to the world. One question. Does realizing your powerless violates the principle of taking responsibility. Sometimes I have difficulty reconciling the two. Keep up the excellent work. Your voice is needed in our world.

  28. It’s so amazing to me that I seem to be guided to “stumble upon” just the thing I needed to hear / be reminded of at just the right time. I was sitting here this morning trying to work through an instance of uncertainty in the future, really letting it affect my weekend. Thank you!

  29. But I thought we are so supposed to manifest our destiny? Now we surrender? Is that step 2?

    So glad to find you today!

  30. Just shared this vlog,to my best girlf bc now she has a difficult time,and I was guided during the prayer to share this with her,although may she is a bit far away from the whole spiritual idea,But who knows:)

  31. It feels so good to hear your message. you made me laugh when you said that some people try to control the traffic lights …because I do . I try to always control everything and everyone around me. My parents my sister my brother and my botfriend and they rarely do what i want. Your message is liberating I feel so light hearing your message . I am going to try to let go and surrender. thank you so much for thi beautiful message

  32. Truly remarkable message here. That was funny when you said that people are such control freaks that they try to control traffic lights. It’s best to always learn how to flow with life in a natural way!

  33. I needed this! I am currently going through something where I have to make a decision that may affect my life for years to come! How do you let go, without feeling like you’re being mistreated? Just sit back and not say anything to those that are doing the mistreating to you?

  34. Another brilliantly insightful vlog Gabby. This speaks to me on so many levels right now. I’m in the midst of waiting to hear about my dream job and whether I landed an interview or not… and it’s like torture, the waiting!! This practice will be so helpful for me while I make my transition into my new life, and whether I land my dream job now or not, you’ve helped me to find peace with the idea of a higher power and greater good coming my way. Thank you so much. I’m so grateful to have found you!

  35. Just wanted to say that I also love the part where you mention ‘coaching yourself’ – and getting “back into the know again”…. So reassuring! I can feel when I’m ‘slipping’ (into fear or control, etc) – and then I need to get centered/ realigned again as well. In spite of being aware of and appreciative of being guided, I still need that reminder regularly (to let go of outcomes). Thank you for your inspiration!

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