How to Accept the Things You Cannot Change

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My serenity began when I got sober nearly ten years ago. In my sober recovery I was taught the difference between what I could control and what I couldn’t. I was guided to become a spiritual student and lean on a power greater than me. My spiritual path has been a daily routine of learning to rely on the love of the universe and release my faith in fear. One prayer that has guided me on this journey is the Acceptance Prayer from the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous:

And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation — some fact of my life — unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.

Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God’s world by mistake.

In this video I share a story about how I was recently humbled through the practice of acceptance and reminded of my true purpose. If you’re hung up in any area of your life I’m confident that my lesson in this video will teach you how to accept the things you cannot change.

This month on my Monthly Miracle Membership I dive deeper into this topic and share transformational tools for embracing acceptance into every area of your life. To help further guide you on the journey of acceptance, I also share my acceptance meditation. Get More Gabby here.


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  1. It’s been a rough couple of days so I really needed this reminder and guidance back to centre right at this moment. Beautiful Gabby, you brighten the lives of others like sunshine streaming through an open window on a winters day. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for the wisdom and joy you bring to my life. I wish you more happiness than you ever dreamed possible and for all of your dreams to come to fruition in the most perfect and magical ways XO

  2. Hi Gabby,

    You have no idea how much I needed to hear this today. Thank you for always bringing me the right message I need to hear.

    Your Get More Gabby mantra is on my work pc next to my Miracles Now book 🙂

    Sat nam, Catherine x

  3. In the middle of real estate transactions…. buying,selling, moving….daughter graduating, and off to college in the fall. You have no idea how badly I needed to hear this one today! Thanks dear Gabby! Love you!!!

  4. If there ever was a time when I needed this…Thank you!!!

    The universe has my back – and this was my miracle message I needed.

    Sat Nam.

  5. This is SO right! ? Your advice really hit me yesterday. I tend to get into littleness and that feeling of overwhelming, tiring pressure. And the “I am the servant of something fucking unstopabble” sentence is so freeing and helpful. It made me realise that I don’t need to control everything and that my problems are not the most important thing right now. I’m SO going to make this my mantra, too, because it makes me feel safe, peaceful and sure that everything will fall right into its place.

    Thank you, thank you, thank you! 🙂

  6. Beautiful. Your words speak truth to me. Life is so hard sometimes! My husband recently dx as infertile but I am not. I want to be a mom so badly! I think the universe is telling me I will mother in a different capacity.

  7. The video was just what I needed to hear..feeling overwhelmed with life and planning for the future etc. Hearing you talk was like hearing my own thoughts out loud….I appreciate the reminder that I am just the servant not the MASTER.

    I will be divinely guided and supported. The mantra felt very powerful!!!
    P.S. was the video connected to the blog about acceptance…they seemed like two different topics?

  8. Wonderful sparky Gabby!

    Thank you so much for this!!! I was asking for a miracle today to bring myself back on track with strenght and integrity to finish what I was lead to do, to be and to go… I took my time for my spirit: I listened to Mastin Kipp for almost two hours, I finished listening to Marianne Williamson ‘A woman’s worth’ and took a ride with my bysicle to sit by the river and get myself together. Still something was missing, and this is it, your words brought back to center, to the fullest: you are a servant to something f**ing unstoppable. I was so overwhelmed by these words in a good way, as if I was reminded to the core why I was lead to this relationship, to this learning course that I’m creating at the moment, to the need for moving overseas TX… I really don’t know how on Earth I will do this fully, but you reminded me, that time and space is in His hands and I will be given all the support that is needed for the direction that I am guided to.

    Thank you from all my heart! and this is it, Gabbrielle, we are servants to something f**ing unstoppable!!!

    Sending much love,

  9. I love get more Get More Gabby so much it’s not even funny! It’s so nice to have something new and exciting to look forward to each month. I get excited for the end of the month for the new content but then ration it and wait to listen and want it to last all month hahaha anyways it’s my fav thanks gab!

  10. this is fucking-awesome in the most beautiful way. going to re-listen and then write it on the mirror. really appreciate your transparency. have a most-excellent monday 🙂

  11. I usually love your stuff but today I found it a distasteful that you are repeatedly saying “fucking” and then ending with Satnam.
    I am a Sikh woman and that just doesn’t sit right with me.

    For those reading this and not knowing what Satnam means
    Satnam (Gurmukhi:??? ???? ) is the main word that appears in the Sikh sacred scripture called the Guru Granth Sahib. It is part of the Gurbani shabad called Mool Mantra which is repeated daily by all Sikhs. This word succeeds the word “Ek-onkar” which means “There is only one constant” or commonly “There is one God”. The words sat means “true/everlasting” and nam means “name”.[1]In this instance, this would mean, “whose name is truth”.[2]

    1. I happen to agree. occasionally i curse to get my point across but I’m starting to feel less connected to the words. I appreciate your feedback:)

  12. So pressurized from every side right now and trying to unstress to keep my health & well being intact. I think this post was meant for me! XXOO

  13. Gabby, you are truly a connected, iridescent soul! What a perfect and timely message. I am in the midst of creating my first ever program to share with others and I can so easily get caught up in that feeling of overwhelm as there is so much to do. That video and mantra was exactly what I needed to hear. Feeling guided once again! Thank you 🙂

    1. yes, agree I could definately feel her pain and see it in her eyes, but compassion for that pain in whatever way it is expressed. The “bad” times will always cycle into the “good” times, it is all to be appreciated and learned from. Those that feel and reflect on the bad and pain can evolve from it stronger.

  14. Yes, Yes and Yes! God’s timing is always perfect. Needed this like everyone else here.
    Blessings Gabrielle!

  15. Gabby,

    I love this feeling down today. An in my face bold brilliant mantra. It is hard for me to see the bigger picture sometimes. Now I’ll get on with my day….

  16. I went to a psychologist when my life fell apart a few years ago.
    She actually told me, over and over again, that I’m exactly where I need to be.
    The journey has been long, my heart has been cracked open, and I’m still wandering around in the dark, trying to get back on track.
    I’ve felt that life has passed me by, that I’m wasting my best years on heartbreak and sorrow.
    But my psycologist was right. Right? It’s not a waste. I’m a servant to something fucking unstoppable.
    That’s a real epiphany.

  17. Dear Gabi. I have been a L-O-N-G time devote to your video blogs. I used to find them very uplifting. Remember when you were so in the flow that you actually had flying little white lights showing up around you in your video like fireflies?
    Every word has a hi or low vibration frequency and swear words have a very low vibe that is perhaps why when we meditate or channel information these words do not come through. Lets stay in the frequency of higher vibe. It just feels better. Namaste everyone. : )

    1. Yes I agree. I wanted to love the mantra, but the swearing seemed so abrasive, it just took away from the message. If it was for shock value, it worked. But in the opposite way for me. I won’t be using that mantra word for word, that’s for sure.

    2. the swearing didn’t bother me. I like that it’s honest, truthful, real- it makes spirituality more in the world and relatable to every day life and struggles. low vibe high vibe whatevs it’s a vibe of the All.

    3. i too have mixed feelings about it. I’m beginning to feel less connected to the swearing. Though for a long time it felt very natural. I appreciate everyone’s feedback. I will continue to do what is real for me and I hope you’ll forgive me if I occasionally piss you off:) xoxox Sat Nam my friends.

  18. Yes!!! I really needed to hear this today. I am almost 38 weeks pregnant and I am trying to not get overwhelmed with thinking I can control when my baby is going to arrive. I need to surender and realise that this experience is all about my baby and nothing to do with me. Thank you Gabby once again for your amazing wisdom!! xxx

  19. WOW….I needed something else to have me make a new choice today…a new perspective – because YES..I have been feeling like it’s all too much! I had a complete MELT DOWN yesterday – cried and cried and yelled too! Talking it out with my sister did help me immensely. But in the end – what really ended up making me feel even BETTER…was getting back to work of BEING OF SERVICE! Having that purpose there, really brought me back on track. Then hearing this today….BLOWN AWAY!
    Thank you so much for sharing your light with the world. And for being REAL. I have only recently discovered you in my world – and I am soooo glad I did. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

  20. As I’m sitting in an AA meeting I started to think of how awesome it would be for you to officiate my wedding (I’m not even engaged lol). So I decided to go on your website and I come across this. How perfect! Being introduced to your work around a year ago really encouraged me to start my own journey in sobriety. And I’m prod to say today I have 4 months sober 🙂 Thank you for your service Gabby. Xo

  21. Every time this song, ‘Shut Up and Dance’ by Walk the Moon, comes on, I am reminded of your teachings. It is really tempting to struggle against fear but your words always bring me back to the choice for peace. Thanks Gabby!

  22. Loved, loved, loved this! After a manic few weeks where I am chasing my tail, trying to stop to take a breath but also, in the same vein KNOW that the path I’m on is the right one, this was brilliant and just what I needed to hear. Thanks Gabby!!!! x

  23. Hey Gabby & gang,

    I loved this video, its so true.

    We really do need to get out of the way and just show up with a willingness to get into the flow!

    Love, love love your work! Sile xxx

  24. Gabby, thank you! I had a melt down this morning after my four kids were out the door to school. My husband is an entrepreneur and has been in a holding pattern for the past seven months as he tries to get his co off the ground and funded…no pay check for seven months…I meditate, pray speak to God, the universe, angels and wait..I try to practice detattachment but when things remain stagnant, it can be so unnerving. I see miracles everyday, I believe in love and I needed to hear that nothing happens in God’s world by mistake. Thank you for sharing this today. PEACE

  25. I am very thankful for your service. Always exactly what I need to hear – when I need to hear it. So much love for you, Gabby. <3 xo

  26. You are f*cking amazing. You have served as a miracle in my life. I met you five years ago and am a completely different person because of it. I recently had a breakthrough, a shift in mindset, and am literally a new person. I am ready to be great and come into my role as a servant of something that’s f*cking unstoppable. I bow to you. P.S. I’m about to graduate teacher training at Kundalini Yoga East. I have to stop by Golden Bridge very soon.

    Life is good.

  27. Sometimes, you have to be aware that the things that we have committed to are not the things that God/The Universe has required. Have to do a check with the ego. Then, at that point, be willing to release some of the things/expectations in order to allow God/The Universe to step in and assist us with what is really important. If we continue to “do it all”, then, we are in the way of someone’s opportunity to make a difference to bless us and/or be a blessing in whatever way is needed at the moment. It’s ok to admit that we can’t “do it all”! Life is meant to be enjoyed! Then, the miracle comes!

  28. This came to me at the perfect time. I just finished two weeks of fighting my ego, wallowing in self pity and doubt. Yesterday I was reminded of the power of intention and the joy of life. Today, I am once again shown that I am a servent to something fucking unstoppable and that truly ducking rock!

  29. THankyou so much for this !! It really helped me – I have been putting so much pressure on myself – just letting it go and letting god .

  30. Hi Gabby,
    I’m in the middle of ‘May Cause Miracles.’ Specifically I’m slap bang in the body image week. (Eeek) I knew I was going to struggle with this one, but not in the way I expected. I’ve always been self-conscious about this or that regarding my looks and body, and my ego has been great at reminding me of my short comings (emphasis on the word ‘short’ 😛 )
    Anyway, I’m finding it easier than expected to stop these negative messages from my ego about ‘me.’ What I can’t reconcile is the understanding that our bodies are an illusion.
    I get the underlying premise, and believe it too – we’re not the body we’re the spirit inside. This is evident when you hear people say things like ‘sure, s/he’s beautiful, but when you get to know them they are not all that nice.’ We’ve all experienced something like that – someone who we think is stunning then we get to know them and suddenly we don’t see the outside any more but what’s beneath. (Or, indeed, vice versa) The proverbial ‘judging a book by it’s cover’ adage.
    But my problem is this – if we are to reject all perceptions of our body – how well we look today, how slim and toned we’ve become, how nice we look in that new lipstick – then, besides working out, eating well, staying healthy and sleeping enough to keep our vessel intact, why do we dress in nice clothes, put on makeup, do our hair? Essentially, aren’t all these ‘ego’ or aesthetic concerns? Should we reject all this too? This is the part I’m struggling with understanding. Help?

  31. Thank you thank you thank you! I wish sooo much to light the way for others & be the brightest I can but my path is sometimes so dimmed by my egos doubts, I find it hard to believe I can do it ~ Your message says to me “just let it go & trust- you will be shown the way and this thing that you’re part of is fucking unstoppable!” Love it! Love you~ big hugs, xxx

  32. I graduated from university here in Australia in November 2013. I worked hard at school to get into the best university and almost killed myself to push through and get my degree. I have struggled for the 18 months since graduating, unable to find employment. I have done a total of 3 years of interning. I have experience. I have a degree. Yet, no matter how many jobs I apply for, the flow is stuck. I made peace with it, greatly helped by when I saw you in Sydney Gab (I was front row in a Camilla kaftan!) I finally, finally received word, after relentless applications and cold calls, that I had a job interview at a large company I have wanted to work for for a great deal of time. The interview was scheduled for six weeks after that contact. I was patient.

    The morning of my interview, I got a massive migraine. I have suffered migraines for the better part of ten years and they are debilitating – I go completely blind, vomiting, lose feeling in my hands, it’s horrendous. I had this one opportunity to interview, and so my mum took the day off work (she works in a hospital running a clinic, so this was an extraordinary deal) so that she could take me in, as I still had not regained my vision or feeling in my hands. As we were about to get into the cab, I asked my mum to quickly check my email and to double check the address. She told me to sit down, and informed me the women interviewing me had emailed that morning to say that she had to post pone our 10am interview for another fortnight at least.

    I cried. Mum cried. I felt so defeated.

    Then mum told me that above that email in my inbox was a Vlog from “Your Angel Gabby” (that’s how you are known in my house) titled “how to accept things you cannot change”

    I don’t know what the message of this is. Or why it has happened in this way.
    I don’t know if I am being tested to see how much I want it.
    Or being told to find a new path.

    But I now know for sure – I am a servant of something fucking unstoppable.
    Thank you xx

    1. omg I cannot believe you and mum have named me that. what an honor…. bless u sister. I’ve got your back.

  33. Hi Gabby
    I like listening to you a lot but this time I am not so sure if it is about “something fucking unstoppable” or rather about a red flag, which wants to remind you “to take care of yourself”….Just a thought that crossed my mind…May all good things come to you including miracles ;o)

    1. clearly not everyone on this blog agrees:) mixed reviews on the f word… I’ll just continue to keep it real… xoxo

  34. Thanks so much for this…I’ve taken a few steps backwards I let my panic attacks take control. Unfortunately I turn to alcohol to deal with it but then it makes it worse. I really would like to stop that cycle and you give me hope. I fell back on meditating and I’m going to start to make that my main priority and I’m going to start may cause miracles again????thank you for all of your inspiration

  35. I definitely needed to see this today I have suffered with anxiety and panic attacks for years and sometimes I will drink to “help”. But it’s a cycle I’m willing to break finally I need to get back to my meditation practice and am also going to read may cause miracles. I feel you are an amazing influence….thank you ????????????

  36. Just is good when people believe about they are serving something or for someone else. That is good motivation to accept hard things are happening with people. I also always believe and say to myself that each time I feel empty and feel depress that I am doing something to serve something or for someone, my work is always work with my best to make it really worth for me and other time work together. Thanh you remind, it really is my secret overcome hard time in my life. Believe me, it really help people.

  37. O Gabby…You are amazing (& super funny as well!)
    Allow me to share my last two days.
    I had SUCH A BAD day yesterday and I lost my cool. Meditation? pfft!
    Hug a tree? double pfft!
    Today I woke up feeling better and and with my gratitude for the women in my life, in particular, my sista Maji.
    She was like a cool breeze in the middle of my hell day but even then I was acting like “I don’t wanna….waaa”. Goddess bless that woman!
    She also sent me this video a little while ago and as soon as I heard it, I lost it laughing. Not because the message wasn’t serious but because my problems aren’t THAT serious either.

    “I am the servant of something fucking unstopabble”
    Can we vote this mantra for “mantra of the year”? For serious. lol

    Thank you Gabby. Thank you Maji. Thank-you to all the amazing goddesses in my life. Thank you life. Thank-you to each one of you reading this. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

    1. LMAO You crack me up, K! It is the truth that we are serving something way bigger than us, or else we wouldn’t really voluntarily devote so much time to our practice! The planets have done a number on all the signs at various times this year, and it’s super important for us to maintain a balance and center ourselves, perhaps after a few little cursing sessions (I get that cursing isn’t the best thing, but I believe from what I read Gabby’s a Scorpio and is gonna be effing real with herself and you, so ease up guys, sheesh! lol) I hope this new moon in Taurus provides serenity and calmness to propel us forward to new heights and infinite possibilities, and that the retrograde is not too harsh on everyone. Peace, sistas! xoxo

  38. What are your thoughts on extra marital affairs if someone is staying married for good reason and their children?

  39. Love this! You have no idea how much I needed to hear this today. That’s for share your experience and message.

  40. That short phrase literally ignited something inside of me. I felt it explode new energy through me. Thanks for the reminder, that the only person that can stop my destiny, is me.

  41. Hi Gaby,

    Came across this…related today to the meltdown you would have experienced as I had a good few months of reoccurring meltdowns where my ego was fighting hard for my attention, unfortunately there were times where I couldn’t ground myself and re group, I allowed that kind of energy to flow out of me. I feel that because the roller coaster riding then partner grew distant and unplugged me from his life and our relationship. So now I find myself, ‘heartbroken’ and devastated as it all came as such a shock. I am waking up each day doing my best and remembering what you said on this video and harnessing in your words that acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God’s world by mistake.
    Namaste to you and thank you for sharing your gift to the spiritual world!

  42. Dear Gabby, thank you so much for your great work. A lot of things I read or hear from you, feels like ‘coming home’, I’m so thankful for that!!
    I’ve a question because of the video: ‘how to accept things you cannot change’. Since childhood I have problems with my energy. I cannot do a lot of things I would do, because I’m so tired the biggest part of my days. It has something to do with a hersenfunction which was blocked at birth. Is their something I can focus on; I always find out it is so hard to be stopped by a lack of energy… It makes me sad, cause I’m sometimes even to tired to play with my kids…. Is their a meditation, or do you have a vlog or video about accepting how your health is? Cause I feel time and time again my health make me feel uncertain about things I would like to plan and do… Hope to hear from you, much love Johanna

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