How to Be More Resilient: 6 Spiritual & Practical Tips

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I’ve been thinking a lot about resilience lately, and strengthening my own resilience. So in this post I want to share my personal practices with you. I’m outlining 6 spiritual and practical tips for how to be more resilient.

What is resilience?

Resilience is our ability to recover from difficult situations and adapt to change. We often talk about “bouncing back” — that is resilience.

When you think of how to be more resilient, picture a reed: It’s strong, but it’s also flexible. It doesn’t resist the wind and the wind doesn’t break it. The reed moves with the wind.

I’ve been building my resilience

I was recently presented with my own spiritual assignment on resilience. Early this month I finally became willing to accept that I have been suffering with postpartum anxiety, insomnia and panic attacks.( I’ve talked about it a bit on Instagram.)

I’m going to do a big blog post on postpartum anxiety soon, but right now I want to focus on how to be more resilient and the tools I’ve been using to strengthen my own resilience.

6 ways to be more resilient

These spiritual and practical tools will help you to strengthen your resilience so that you can show up for your life with grace and faith no matter what.

I’m turning to these tools every single day, and they’re helping me stay strong and nurture myself during this challenging time.

1. Rely on a higher power.

Tweet: When we’re willing to surrender, an invisible strength takes over and we are guided. @gabbybernstein

When you don’t know how you’re going to get through something, the answer is to give it over to a higher power of your own understanding.

Turning it over takes the burden off you to figure it all out. Healing requires our willingness to heal. When we’re willing to surrender, an invisible strength takes over and we are guided. We open up to inspired solutions and support.

Prayer for Resilience

You can say this prayer as often as you want in order to surrender, welcome guidance and build resilience.

Thank you, inner guide, for revealing to me what I still need to heal. I accept this as a spiritual assignment for great growth. I am committed to my healing path and my highest priority is to align with love. I take this one day at a time and I know I’m getting better every day. I choose to keep this in the day. I do not regret my past and I am not afraid of the future. I trust that the present moment offers me resilience now.

Pay attention to the guidance you receive

Once you’ve surrendered it, pay attention to the ways that God shows up for you. I know I say this a lot, but it bears repeating because we can forget to pay attention.

Spiritual guidance can show up in any number of ways…

  • You may feel an inner knowing or hear an intuitive voice.
  • An idea may come through while meditating, or seemingly out of the blue.
  • You might experience synchronicity, such as unexpectedly hearing a song that is meaningful to you or reading a passage in a book that seems to speak directly to you.
  • You may even see sparks of light or feel a rush of love.

I encourage you to write down all the instances of guidance you receive. Use the Notes app on your phone or keep a pocket notebook with you. When you ask for guidance, you will receive it. Don’t dismiss anything.

2. Change your story.

At first, the story I told myself around my postpartum anxiety was, “I’m the victim.” I was devastated that this was my experience, and I was plagued by panic and exhaustion.

Telling myself this story only made me feel disempowered. So I changed my story. I’ve committed to shifting my perception of myself from victim to brave warrior. I’m proud of my willingness to witness the problem and choose love instead.

Now my story is, “I’m getting better every day.”

3. Honor your feelings with meditation.

I find a deeper meaning and personal growth amid the discomfort | Gabby Bernstein | The Universe Has Your Back card deckResilience isn’t about pushing past our feelings or ignoring them. In order to be truly resilient, we must be able to feel our feelings.

Meditation is a safe way to honor your feelings, move through them and feel more balanced. I recommend meditating at least once every day. A consistent, committed practice cleans up your energy and helps you to be more resilient.

One meditation I’ve been practicing lately is the Kundalini Meditation for Balancing the Nervous Energies. This is a beautiful practice for calming anxiety and balancing your nervous system.

Kundalini Meditation for Balancing the Nervous Energies

Kundalini Meditation for Balancing the Nervous Energies | How to be more resilientHere’s the breakdown of the meditation as taught by Yogi Bhajan.

Posture: Sit in Easy Pose or another comfortable position, with your spine straight.

Mudra (hand position): Bend your elbows and put the palm of your right hand over the back of your left hand. Touch the tips of your thumbs. Move your arms in so that your palms are at heart center. (See the image of me as an example.)

Eyes: Close your eyes or keep them 1/10th open.

Breath: In this meditation you inhale and exhale through your nose. Begin by inhaling deeply through your nose. Calmly hold your breath for 15 seconds. Exhale through your nose. Hold your breath for another 15 seconds.

If 15 seconds is too much for you, you can begin with holding your breath for 8 seconds and then work your way up.

Repeat this breath cycle for 3 to 5 minutes.

Let me help you stay consistent with your meditation practice

Consistency is key in building resilience. When you have a strong spiritual practice, including a regular meditation practice, you’re equipped with resources to help you move through trying times with more peace.

If you want a simple way to stay consistent on your spiritual path, check out my Miracle Membership. Every month I give you brand-new content, including a guided meditation.

Miracle Membership by Gabby Bernstein

Here are a few practices available in the Miracle Membership that can help you be more resilient:

  • Tapping on Anxiety with Nick Ortner (Apr. 2018)
  • Happiness Is a Choice I Make podcast (Apr. 2016)
  • Balance Meditation (Apr. 2019)
  • I Am Truly Supported Meditation (Sept. 2016)
  • Peace Is My Path podcast (July 2017)
  • Judgment Detox Workshop lecture (Jan. 2018)

Click here to learn more about the Miracle Membership.

4. Don’t talk about the problem, talk about the solution.

My Energy Creates My Reality. What I Focus On Is What I Manifest | Gabby Bernstein | The Universe Has Your Back card deckMany of us, when we’re going through something really hard, we talk about it a lot. We obsess over it. We go down Google rabbit holes and find even more to talk about and obsess over. It’s a nasty cycle.

What happens when we talk about the problem constantly is that we give it more momentum. As you’ll learn in my forthcoming book, Super Attractor, what you focus on is what you create. When you think and talk about the problem 24/7, you lower your energetic vibration. As a result, you become an energetic match for more experiences of that same low vibration.

But when you begin to focus on the solution, you shift the momentum. You begin raising your vibration bit by bit, and you start to attract solutions. The solutions might come in the form of doctors or therapists. They might show up as creative ideas or new perspectives. The possibilities are limitless.

The bottom line is this: If you need to vent, vent. But don’t vent all day. Move on and give momentum to the new story.

Build resilience with Emotional Freedom Technique

Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), also known as tapping, is one of my favorite practices. It’s the divine combination of acupressure, positive psychology and neuroscience, and it can deliver fast results.

If you want to be more resilient, try EFT. You can do it every day, and multiple times a day if you wish.

Here’s a wonderful EFT video on healing by Brad Yates:

And here’s another EFT video by Brad Yates that can help you be more adaptable and resilient in everyday life:

Note: EFT can bring unexpected emotions to the surface, so practice with caution. Remember to take full responsibility for your well-being. If you don’t find relief right away, you can keep tapping until you do.

I offer more guidance on EFT in my book Judgment Detox as well as in my free Judgment Detox Mini Course.

Be conscious about who you talk to

One other thing I want to note is that it’s important to be careful about who you lean on while you’re going through something really challenging. Is there someone in your life who cares about you in such a way that they get really nervous and scared when you’re not well?

Maybe this is the case with a parent, your romantic partner or a dear friend. They want to support you, but their connection to you is so strong or their own fears are so raw that they end up making you feel even more worried. That’s not going to help you.

Remember that you’re very impressionable when you’re healing. Protect your energy.

As much as you love them, remember that you’re very impressionable when you’re trying to heal. Be gentle yet firm with your boundaries. Have compassion for them, but lean on someone else instead, whether that’s a friend, a sibling, a therapist, etc.

With people who aren’t in a good position to help you, what you can do is stay in your mantra. You can tell them something like, “Things are hard, but I have help and I’m getting better every day.”

5. Get moving.

Gabby Bernstein's walking path | How to be more resilientThis is key. Exercise not only builds physical strength and endurance, but it also makes the brain more resilient to stress, according to Princeton researchers.

And let’s not forget that moving our body feels good! Move in whatever way feels good to you. I’ve been going on walks with my family, because being outdoors energizes me, grounds me and clears my mind.

There’s a lot of research on the ways exercise reduces stress and helps us relax. Your workout doesn’t need to be intense or complicated to have a massive impact on your resilience and mood. Just move.

6. Remember that you can still be healing and have a good day

Gabby Bernstein smiling outdoors | How to be more resilientI saved this tip for last because I want you to walk away with it fresh in your mind. This is something we all too often forget. You can be going through something hard, you can be healing, you can be in the midst of recovery, and you can have a good day.

I often tell people: String together your moments of joy. When you feel good, allow yourself to feel good. Life is never 100% anything, good or bad. You may be going through a really, really hard spiritual assignment, but still experience glimmers of hope, gratitude, humor and happiness. It’s safe and good to feel good.

Final thoughts…

I’ll leave you with this quote from my dear friend and teacher, the late Dr. Wayne Dyer:

Each experience in your life was absolutely necessary in order to have gotten you to the next place, and the next place, up to this very moment.

Spirit Junkies, I hope these tips serve you. Leave a comment below and let me know how these practices resonate with you.

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86 COMMENTS

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  1. Thank you for sharing this Gabby. I have postpartum anxiety too (my twins are 17 months old) and I am working through it. I have saved this post

  2. Dear Gabby, in the midst of darkness you have always ‘shown up’ in my life with the right messages at the right time. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for you, your wisdom and guidance. May your journey continue to get better every day for you too.
    You are a blessing to me and so many too ~ Thank you. xx

  3. Hi Gabby I’m so sorry to hear that you have been suffering from post partum depression. I know it’s a terrible thing and unfortunately it can affect women who have suffered a big emotional trauma in their earlier life, so I just wanted to offer you my support and to say that you will come out of this but it might take a bit of time. Going for walks sounds great. Eat well. The good news is that as far as I can tell, it usually only happens in this situation with a first child. I don’t have any children but I am well acquainted with depression and what it feels like and I have a great affinity with how we function in this regard. With best wishes and love. Ann xx

  4. Thank you so very much for sharing your knowledge and teaching …. finding you was a miracle for my new awakening….

  5. Recovering from loss of family members and now my daughter is graduating which is awesome, but also a loss. My energy is low, sleep is limited and my tummy is upset

    Many challenges along the way and I am growing tired of my my ‘pity party table for one’

    Thank you for the perfect timing of this spiritual assignment ❤️

  6. Thank you for your words of spiritual wisdom and healing. I’ve just begun my spiritual journey and have learned so much from you already. I have healed in so many ways already and am so motivated to learn more to support my family and me. Stress and anxiety was taking over while being a caregiver to my husband who suffers from PTSD and traumatic brain injury from combat. It was easy to absorb the negative emotions that these illnesses cause. I appreciate all of the insight and guidance from you and other inspirational authors and spiritual leaders. Thank you for all that you do. You are amazing. ❤ I am excited to continue this spiritual journey.

    1. Thanks for this gorgeous share Meggan. Sending you and your husband lots of peace and continued healing. <3

  7. Thank you for sharing this. I wish you well on your spiritual assignment. If anyone can tackle this it is you. You have a lot of love surrounding you.

  8. Thank you for sharing this blog.
    Very inspiring as I struggle with anxiety daily basis and I have made improvement by doing meditation, exercise like walking, breathing taking the time for a mindful moment, drink less coffee, and best of all I sleep my biggest helpful thing that helps me as I’m at risk of seziures if I don’t get sleep and reduce stress where possible.

  9. Thanks so much for sharing this! It arrives exactly at the right time as I change my own story every day going through some bottoms.
    Love and light!

  10. I resonate with so much you have shared here. I am probably very resilient. When I think of a reed in the marsh, blowing in the wind, it feels like me. I am not at peace, however and/or feel free. I have a deep spiritual connection, daily. I have been using movement to help myself, regularly for the last 2 months. I get up. I show up every day. I keep a gratitude journal. I use art to heal. I have not yet used meditation. I guess I don’t motivate myself and I feel alone with it. No, not alone maybe rather like I don’t know how to begin or I feel if I do I won’t stick with it and I am tired of that. I think I am just tired period.

    1. Hi Lee. It sounds like you have many beautiful spiritual practices. Meditation personally changed my life as did making joy a focus. In addition to your daily practices, what’s something that you can prioritize that is FUN and brings you lots of joy?

  11. I love n°6 and Wayne Dyer thought.
    Today, i m feeling that i did a lot of healing but i feel stuck in the same patterns…so i struggle thinking i did all these and i am kind of in the same place. I am at the right time? path? What more i have to do? will i ever change the lovers i choose.

    1. Hi Nicky. Know that this is a practice. Please be gentle and patient with yourself as you incorporate these steps. Showing up and sharing here is a sign that you are truly ready to make some big shifts.

  12. Wow Gabby! This post was spot on for me. Thank you. I’m going thru a tough time and your post gave me the answers I was looking for.
    On another note, my heart goes out to you. My daughters are 17 and 13 and I also had terrible anxiety when I had them. Yoga and meditating helped me tremendously but I know what you’re going thru. Stay strong and may the Universe guide you to a calmer mind.

    Sat Nam

  13. Wow thank you Gabby! This article is so great to remind us of the simple things we can do consistently to move through things, rather than get stuck and dragged down by our trials and difficulties. I especially love the daily meditation and exercise. Even just 10 minutes of each, done every day, can produce miracles! Thank you for your teachings and your courage. And of course, your resilience!

  14. This is exactly what I needed to hear today! A moment of synchronicity for me this morning; I am already receiving guidance! Thank you Gabby

  15. Wonderful! Thank you Gabby! I had my second baby boy three weeks ago and 9 days later suffered a spontaneous coronary artery dissection- or a heart attack. Supposedly it was caused by pregnancy hormones and is very rare. I’m currently struggling with fear….that it’ll happen again or fear of leaving this planet before I’m ready. So I love hearing about being resilient and changing my fear into love. All of Gabby’s tools are so appreciated

    1. Thank you for this brave share mama. I hope these tools offer you some support. Sending you lots of healing energy and appreciation. XOX

  16. Thank you for sharing all this goodness in one blog! It’s amazing how we can simply shift our perception and say a new prayer to help us on our way and to help us feel better. I love waking up Monday mornings and reading your emails – they inspire me to be my best self and to keep showing up no matter what’s going on around me.

    🙂

    Lots of love!

    Hasia

  17. Gabby thank you for bringing to the forefront resilience and how we can build it with spiritual practice. Through my personal experiences and what I saw in my professional practice as a nurse I started to learn the importance of resilience. I wish when I was going through these experiences I had fully embraced my spiritual practice. As a nurse I had the knowledge but that it was not always enough. Over the years as I have grown and learned from my clients/ communities I worked with and more recently students that resilience is important and so needed in todays world. We all have the strength within us to bounce back but sometimes we need guidance and support to help facilitate our potential. Since working with you in Spirit junkie level 1 & 2 my understanding has been expanded. I am learning how meditation, EFT and a spiritual practice can enhance our resilience. If it was not for being introduced to you and your practices I would not have been able to see resilience in a new light. Since Spirit Junkie level 2 I have been trying to figure out how I can blend my knowledge of nursing with these spiritual practices. I started to be intentional and use some of the kundalini meditations with my students who I noticed where filled with overwhelming anxiety. I became trained in EFT so that I could not only use it on myself daily but also with my friends, clients and nursing students. I have been afraid to put myself fully out there. I have let my ego and fear rule me instead of leaning into the love. However, seeing this post this morning was a sign from the universe that I am on the right path. Thank you for all that you do and for bringing to light this important topic. >3>3>3 ❤️

  18. What are your thoughts on therapy and manifesting the undesired because you are working through it?

    Example – I’ve had some disturbing thoughts recently and I want to move on but I also want to know what the heck brought them to the surface.

    1. Hi Kody. I believe that Source/the Universe/God works through amazing therapists and highly advocate for seeing a trained therapist. Sometimes when we are in a place of major healing and release, challenging things come up to be healed.

  19. Thank you so much for your transparency and vulnerability to me… I am using all of these techniques and they are working… Love you Gabby.

  20. Dear Gabby,

    I am sending you light and love as you recover from postpartum anxiety. I experienced the same thing after I had my child, and it was very difficult. It will get better, just keep taking it one day at a time like you are. Your baby is so blessed to have you as a mother. You have been such a positive force in my life with your knowledge and advice. Thank you for all of the good work you do. Hope today has lots of joy and peace for you. 🙂

    Namaste,
    JJ

  21. Thank you, thank you, thank you. As always, it was timely and definitely needed. You put into perspective tips that I haven’t fully thought of before and made me change my perspective on a situation I’m going through. I’m going to look at it as a spiritual assignment and trust that it is given to me for a reason. Easier said than done but going to take on your mantra “I’m getting better everyday”

    Thank you again

  22. Gracias Gabby!
    Estos consejos me vienen como anillo al dedo, más en estos momentos. Te lo agradezco.
    Un abrazo desde Chile!

  23. Thank you so much Gabby. I had postpartum anxiety and insomnia as well which lead to adrenal fatigue. I have learned to be kinder to myself throughout. I found yoga nidra which helped immensely at the time. I then didn’t have the lightheaded/dizziness/heavy feeling in my body for awhile. But now it’s back but I trust and know it’s just another layer for me to release. I know my body knows how to heal I just need to give it the space to do so and to love it no matter what and be willing to feel what I feel and not make my emotions/reactions wrong but rather see them with curiosity and know that my body is screaming for love and attention. To feel into what is in the depths and to just allow. This has given more more tools and I trust that I was guided to read this post. Thank you for the prayer, the great EFT tapping (I already did one) and the wonderful meditation. I just did that while the kids play downstairs. I could hear them which normally stresses me out as I can’t get as deep into a meditation. But I said to myself this is a practice and an invitation to go within despite the noises from downstairs to let it go and let them be kids and play! Another lesson in resilience:) Thank you for sharing your story!

  24. These are amazing!!! I can’t say enough about moving your body and the power of walking in nature! It heals the soul on every level . Thank you Gabby for ALL that you do. Knowing that we are not alone in our struggles is very powerful❤️

  25. Thank you for sharing this blog and your journey. Thank you for sharing your talents and gifts. Sending you positive energy, thoughts, vibes, strength, prayers, hugs, healing, light and love. Namaste

  26. Thanks for your words of wisdom.I am sending prayers up for healing and an increase of joy for you.I am excited for this new level of authenticity you are expressing. May we all cherish the light we find in dark times.Yes, that is a true Spiritual Warrior.
    God Bless

  27. Oh Gabby, you are so sweet and open…thank you for your great quote and blog…JUST WHAT I NEEDED♥️ I know i’m growing every day…I just FEEL it‍♀️ and loving it!

    Love you…and keep up your great work So great how you help yourself and others…You are one of my INSPIRATORS and TEACHER

  28. Amazing blog, anxiety is at the forefront for me today. I have a constant spiritual practice, but reading that I should honour what’s up is the message I needed to hear today. Thank you, much love

  29. Dear Gabby, Thank you for your thoughts. I had to look up the word ‘resilience’. It means ‘veerkracht’ in Dutch. It resonated deep in me. I going to make it the theme for my yoga classes this week. Thank you for your inspiration. Always looking forward to your mails. Warmly Anette

  30. Thank you so much for this blog. It has been an incredible tough period in my life and just reading through this blog has given me a new perspective on the issue. Have a wonderful day and blessings for a remarkable day Gabby. <3 <3 <3

  31. Gabby your prayer for resilience is absolutely beautiful!! It’s really hit home for me lately how much more valuable resilience is than stability. I know having a good routine and healthy habits is key, but ultimately being resilient is so important!! Life is unpredictable, and that’s kinda one of the most amazing things about it! Resiliency is how we keep getting back up and having the courage to shine another day.

  32. Hi, Gabby! I’ve been following your blog since I read The Universe Has Your Back, and I’m so thankful for your guidance; I believe you truly were a godsend. I normally don’t post anything online, but I’ve been following your postpartum journey and feel compelled to tell you it WILL get better. I went through this when my son was born and felt like the rug had been pulled out from under me. No one talks about this at the cutesy baby showers. It’s almost purposely NOT talked about, so I deeply respect your honesty and vulnerability. Just know that it’s perfectly normal what you’re experiencing. You’re just transitioning from a life lived on your own, from doing your own thing to a life now dedicated to another human being that is completely dependent on you. It’s really hard for independent women like us, but I know you’ll ace this assignment just like every obstacle you’ve encountered. It took me time, tears, prayer, and a wonderful, supportive husband, but I got through it…and so will you. My little man is now going through his terrible twos…which is a whole different level of parenting, lol. I wish you the best and the strength you need to adjust. <3

  33. I had the same spiritual assignment given to me after the birth of my first born in November 2012. It shook me hard to the core, but it was the beginning of my spiritual journey and the birth of finding a better version of me. My experience lead me to who I am today and I wouldn’t change it for the world. Your courage in sharing your most vulnerable moments is inspirational and I am positive you will make a difference in many new mums’ lives by doing so. Thank you for your bravery and teachings.

  34. Thank you, Gabby, for embodying and sharing, your beautiful spirit of honesty and integrity. You have been a spark of God for me, many times ..a wonderful solace and an admirable example .. prayers of peace and blessing today and always
    ps have you researched the anti-anxiety effects of st.john’s wort?

    1. Sending big hugs your way Kate! I can’t speak on St. John’s Wort but deeply believe in the healing powers of certain herbs. XOX

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